tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post577496513408990460..comments2023-12-28T11:27:12.248-06:00Comments on The Art of Being Conflicted: Friends or FrenemiesCperzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09062444081488414888noreply@blogger.comBlogger52125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-27502332555919352152014-04-01T12:41:31.127-05:002014-04-01T12:41:31.127-05:00I love your comment. I am totally on board with t...I love your comment. I am totally on board with that thought that Zuckerberg is laughing at us not with us as he stacks his $100 bills in neat little piles. FB was created for marketing our information but like bees swarm to the hive...all the people jump on board as if it was intended to unify the masses. I think it has the capacity to keep us connected but that is not FB's purpose. That is just a benefit if we use it accordingly. <br />I hate...can't stress this enough...HATE any website that requires me to long in with my Facebook account. Where I buy consumer goods shouldn't need to know every little thing about me.Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-86547129518890208222014-03-31T21:43:55.765-05:002014-03-31T21:43:55.765-05:00Ya I've never liked Facebook. I have one to ta...Ya I've never liked Facebook. I have one to talk to family mostly. Sometimes friends. I just think Facebook is the most unethical company. Selling your information and having all sorts of privacy implications. They even record anything you type and erase. I wouldn't be surprised if Mark Zuckerberg actually said "They trust me — dumb f**ks" like it was reported a few years back.Electric Addicthttp://www.electricaddict.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-77419282083188346732014-03-31T10:42:08.570-05:002014-03-31T10:42:08.570-05:00I have to be honest. There is a couple of siblings...I have to be honest. There is a couple of siblings that have cut themselves off from the rest of us, one way or another but, although sad, two out of seven isn't too bad.babs (beetle)http://beetle-blog.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-81268330392689295412014-03-31T09:55:26.852-05:002014-03-31T09:55:26.852-05:00I agree. I don't have that problem as I haven&...I agree. I don't have that problem as I haven't been able to locate any of my past friends and I only have family that get along with each other :)babs (beetle)http://beetle-blog.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-41077784298416264182014-03-31T09:48:27.040-05:002014-03-31T09:48:27.040-05:00Several times any given year there seems to be a v...Several times any given year there seems to be a viral story concerning a mom that is defending herself against some moron making a nasty comment about public breast feeding. This particular story is a new twist because the nasty comment was on FB. Again the problem arises that someone felt the need to be vile. The act of adding the word "tramp" in connection to a young mother feeding her baby is quite different than the discussion in general of breastfeeding. Although, I am still not clear how the comment would be truly anonymous on FB. Everyone has a profile. <br />As for Sherry, your right, of course, if she didn't like the discussion...ignore it and move on. If there was an actual debate built into the discussion and others were weighing in on the pros and cons of missing having babies in the house, then everyone needs to discuss it like adult women. The second the word "baby-hater" came into play it was time to leave the discussion. There's no way that you can discuss something rationally with someone that resorts to name calling. <br />I am constantly amazed how people have lost the art of discussion. It is no longer interesting and entertaining but more often, devisive and argumentative.Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-61207157362589279142014-03-31T07:53:05.370-05:002014-03-31T07:53:05.370-05:00I find it interesting how much you and I share in ...I find it interesting how much you and I share in our perspective of things. I, too have been giving a lot of thought over the winter about the part social media plays in my life especially in the realm of blogging. I agree with you that spending a lot of time on the Internet can, in fact, be isolating. <br />While I have never been an avid user of FB, that has always been my approach to it...very few comments and frequent use of the LIKE button. I think there is a huge capacity for people not to understand or at least in part miscontrue the tenor of a message, if they don't know the writer on a personal level. <br />I find that I am often uncomfortable when the subject switches to religion, politics, money or sex as well. If the topic is general as in a philosophical discussion of spirituality, for example I am OK, I am not fine when it gets specific and candid...no I am not up for that. There is clearly a large group that has no apprehension concerning TMI. I rarely leave a comment on any blog or FB post that deals with any of those subjects. ESPECIALLY POLITICS...talk about a volatile subject.Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-86991910233237983052014-03-31T07:32:17.161-05:002014-03-31T07:32:17.161-05:00My husband also was into playing some FB game and ...My husband also was into playing some FB game and acquired a lot of "friends" and he also just keeps the ones that he got to "know" albeit thru the Internet. I think that you have a very healthy perspective about using FB. Keep the contacts that add to your group and ditch the rest. <br />The problem arises, in part, if someone in your group is friends with someone who is a problem. For example, my follows his sons as a friend. (of course) but his ex-wife follows them as well...so my brother sees comments she makes. <br />There is some nice benefits to social media but it can be a real stresser as well.Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-27924733632793707382014-03-31T07:11:27.488-05:002014-03-31T07:11:27.488-05:00Oh, I completely forgot to say this about what you...Oh, I completely forgot to say this about what you posted. The two scenarios you posted about aren't unfamiliar to me. <br /><br /><br />I saw the picture of the woman breastfeeding her child pass through my news feed and I just smiled, nodded, and kept going. I didn't realize this was used without her permission and that's wrong. The picture itself probably caused a huge ruckus on FB and folks probably lobbied to have it taken down because it's 'pornographic.' I've seen that kind of thing more often than I can stand.<br /><br /><br />In the other case, Sherry could have just walked away from that thread. What was the point in adding her 2 negative cents to a thread where moms were waxing poetic about missing the baby years? I've seen so many threads where a group of friends are having a good old time reminiscing about something that I experienced differently and it costs me nothing to move on and everything to jump in and stir up a controversy. It's just not worth it and it's so unimportant.Cherylhttp://decksidethoughts.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-3791871443925072952014-03-31T06:21:04.662-05:002014-03-31T06:21:04.662-05:00Over the winter, I've been doing a shit-ton of...Over the winter, I've been doing a shit-ton of thinking about the role all of social media, including blogging, plays in my life. As an introvert, it's an easy way to stay connected and still stay out of the fray. Unfortunately, social media allows me to drop into my introversion to the point of isolation. I don't interact anywhere near as much as I used to on FB, and when I do, I tend to comment less and use the like button more. The less well I know someone, the easier it is for my written comment to be misconstrued. I may be the person who previously made the comment that emoticons are almost a necessity on social media sites and I'm done playing that game. I've also grown tired of trying to decipher autocorrect and improper use of ordinary grammar.<br /><br /><br /><br />I learned the Golden Rule as a little kid and also remember hearing and then adhering to the rule that there are subjects we don't discuss in polite company: politics, religion, money, and sex. I'm not comfortable talking about any of those things in a mixed group of people in my home and I'm certainly not going to discuss them on Facebook, which is definitely NOT polite company.Cherylhttp://decksidethoughts.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-55240122147693207042014-03-30T11:19:34.545-05:002014-03-30T11:19:34.545-05:00Over the many years I've used Facebook, I have...Over the many years I've used Facebook, I have had many friends that I don't know at all. I used to play a game that required many friends. I think I got close to 2000 friends - all strangers. I didn't get involved in many of their comments and never their disputes. Once I made the decision to stop playing the game I unfriended almost all of them. I kept those that I got friendly with and they are still my friends. If I see any negative posts on any of their walls, I simply unfriend them. Life is too short for negativity and nastiness.babs (beetle)http://beetle-blog.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-65327319060547549182014-03-29T13:38:15.206-05:002014-03-29T13:38:15.206-05:00Thanks, Katherine! How funny...before I saw your ...Thanks, Katherine! How funny...before I saw your comment I was over on your blog reading about the poor Knight that was locked out. Now that is the fun kind of thing that makes Facebook entertaining but there is so much of it that seems like it's aimed at stirring up arguments or controversy...or as you point out DRAMA. <br /><br />I think it is wise to ignore the "friend request" from the boss. Even if bosses are friends...they don't need an open door to our private life. About the time some relative brings up some family drama or brings up some past "remember when" that you had hoped everyone had forgotten about...then it gets embarrassing. <br /><br />Recently a couple of our relatives have put pictures on FB that we aren't exactly excited to see and wouldn't be thrilled for employers to view. You can't pick your family but it turns out you can pick your friends.Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-91629904460968097742014-03-29T09:01:47.131-05:002014-03-29T09:01:47.131-05:00I LOVED this post... one of your best so far and s...I LOVED this post... one of your best so far and such a great topic. Do you know I recently had a friend invite from my big boss? REALLY!?!? How bizarre!!! I rarely see or talk to him. Yes, we are friendly, but why would he want to be a friend on facebook? I ignored it... fingers in ears going la la la laaaaa.<br /><br />I hate it when people type things that are open ended to get attention. "I am so angry at someone right now for something horrible they did to me!" Of course then everyone comments..."OH NO! What happened! Are you OK? Who was it!" It is just an obvious way to get one person mad and others curious.<br /><br />But I love seeing pictures of babies, dogs and funny things people saw during the day. I think facebook is a great way to keep in touch with friends who you don't see every day. However, facebook drama? I don't have time for this ha ha!Katherine Murrayhttp://www.shoot-me-now.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-64262447322504767372014-03-28T13:12:57.636-05:002014-03-28T13:12:57.636-05:00I am glad you're back all safe and sound.
Yes...I am glad you're back all safe and sound.<br /><br />Yes, just about any trendy word any more makes it's way into the Oxford Dictionary. Words like twerking probably don't need to be in there but then the Oxford people didn't feel the need to check in with me. <br /><br />You certainly aren't alone as far as Facebook goes. I think I am in the minority. My husband is addicted as well and occasionally, I will check to see what he's posting for fear I am making my way into an anecdote. I do find it interesting, as you say, when someone posts some horrible life event and everyone is hitting the LIKE. Just got divorced...LIKE Just had major surgery and have a grim prognosis...LIKE. <br /><br />I do think that FB needs to offer some other buttons to hit. Like is rather limiting. <br /><br />Have a great weekend!!Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-27566569209372014972014-03-28T12:55:11.642-05:002014-03-28T12:55:11.642-05:00I am sure you are right that cartoons soften the m...I am sure you are right that cartoons soften the message (although most of my messages are pretty "meh") and keep the haters at bay. I haven't gotten any really hateful messages. More just being called out for my opinion or what someone perceived my opinion to be. <br /><br />You would be proud of me for my return message to the woman that called me a Mormon hater. She started her email saying that she was a Mormon...and yet I did NOT say..what's up with the fact you can't read the difference between moron and Mormon. I told her to sit down, chill out, drink a glass of wine and grab a cigarette. (°_/°)<br /><br />That video is really funny. Maybe we should all go back to having duels when we have disagreements. Of course, it would have to be paint balls or nerf balls or something. While the NRA might want the real thing, I doubt that we need two mommies on the playground breaking out the Glocks. Although, clearly that would make for some great blogging material.Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-2448286016733081892014-03-28T11:57:54.728-05:002014-03-28T11:57:54.728-05:00Hi, Cheryl. I've missed your blog. It's go...Hi, Cheryl. I've missed your blog. It's good to be back.<br /><br />I'm amused that "frenemey" is an official word. I think it'd rather use "eneend" - or something like that, to emphasis the enemy aspect of the relationship. I have several folks in my life that applies to. <br /><br />Facebook is one of my addictions - for better and for worse. I've been hurt by others' posts on it and have unfriended some frenemies or hidden their posts. The ridiculous thing too, is that we use "like" to save time. You find people liking horrible things that happen to their so-called friends. "My dog died. I missed him terribly" will get lots of likes. How warped is that?!<br /><br />Keep a smile and be well.<br />xoRobynRobyn Engelnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-28763367410124913402014-03-28T11:13:34.832-05:002014-03-28T11:13:34.832-05:00Having Crabby Pants as a spokesperson would defini...Having Crabby Pants as a spokesperson would definitely help. I think we can get away with more because we have our silly little cartoon avatars speaking for us and people know they're very exaggerated versions of ourselves. I don't know what it is about representing yourself with a cartoon that makes people less likely to jump down your throat, but it works. The amount of hate mail and rude comments we've gotten over 4 years of blogging is surprisingly little. Like single digits.<br /><br />Maybe it IS the equivalent of saying everything with an emoticon...<br /><br />I'm anti-Mormon and proud of it (not really), just based on those that come to my door at 8 in the morning thinking the guy with a cowlick in his underwear has any interest in hearing about Joseph Smith and his shenanigans. Plus they say having beer is a sin. PASS.<br /><br />"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” - Ben Franklin<br /><br />Oh, and I take that back... a duel with unloaded guns would probably be a lot more entertaining than a mommy brawl.<br /><br />Think the last few moments from this great animated short.<br /><br />https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qi2kaDzGh9Aabeerfortheshowernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-8810437871599818652014-03-28T00:48:57.993-05:002014-03-28T00:48:57.993-05:00I know and that's what I really don't get....I know and that's what I really don't get. That these people truly believe they have every right to tell you what to do on your own blog and social media pages. I've even had girls, I'd say Gen Ys, email me to tell what I should and shouldn't be saying and how I should be saying it on my blog. It's absolute garbage. Unfortunately, when you're on a public page, like for a tv show or magazine, it's a free for all.Lady Jewels Divanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-70599029122106952692014-03-27T21:07:22.611-05:002014-03-27T21:07:22.611-05:00Wow...I mean really WOW, that is some really nast...Wow...I mean really WOW, that is some really nasty commentary. I swear if someone called me a troll or told me to mind my own business on MY blog...I would really be hurt. (I am thin-skinned) Not only would I have to delete the comments but I would be in tears. Truly. <br /><br />On the subject of obesity...there is hardly any subject that causes people to lose their minds like the subject of being overweight. It ranks as high as politics in getting people stirred up.Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-16833679789278152842014-03-27T20:46:31.532-05:002014-03-27T20:46:31.532-05:00Yes, there is absolutely a similarity to high scho...Yes, there is absolutely a similarity to high school clicks, if you think about it. You are forming groups of people that overlap into other groups and asking them if they LIKE you. Kind of like passing a note saying "do you like me? ___ yes ____no. <br /><br />Is there anything a person can say that isn't up for debate in this current culture? It seems that there are such big leaps from what a person says and what someone says they said. As was the case of the moms. If someone says they don't want to go back to the time of having babies, that is a far cry from being a baby hater. <br /><br />There is a drama momma in every group.Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-74267063044659601152014-03-27T20:39:42.121-05:002014-03-27T20:39:42.121-05:00I totally agree about the photographer being a sle...I totally agree about the photographer being a sleazeball. What would possess a person to be that hateful? <br /><br /><br /><br />I guess if someone unfriends you because of your political beliefs it pretty much says that person isn't able to able to accept other peoples point of view...so it is just as well they aren't actively on your page anyway.<br /><br /><br />One of the many problems with FB is that if I set up a page for Crabby Pants it auto links to my personal page. Same with my blog page. It traces back to my personal page. So if I really wanted to talk smack about someone in my family there would be no hiding. (Not that I would ever talk smack about a family member **cough, cough**Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-39155251772044788132014-03-27T19:34:57.421-05:002014-03-27T19:34:57.421-05:00OMG; Facebook - UGH! It's the portal of evil ...OMG; Facebook - UGH! It's the portal of evil allowing the high school years to live on when we all believed them to be behind us - safely dead and gone. The petty fights that have turned into micro rages at stupid stuff, like "baby haters" .. who are nothing more than honest mothers who are thankful they no longer have dirty diapers and sore boobs... because come on - NOBODY adored that, and if they did, they were mental, and should be medicated. -- and watch, just my saying THAT will start a whole new argument and online backlash for mocking (or not embracing) those who need to be medicated. As far as I'm concerned, Facebook isn't any better than crack; it's wack! ;)ravenjanedohnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-32534062114842700312014-03-27T19:28:34.811-05:002014-03-27T19:28:34.811-05:00People should be adult and mature about disagreein...People should be adult and mature about disagreeing, unfortunately they don't get that calling you a bitch or bully or telling you to pull your head out because they don't like what you wrote is actually making them exactly what they're calling you. <br /><br />I'm attacked a lot for WHAT I say instead of them discussing the subject. I wrote a comment on a tv show FB wall once about the topic they were discussing and someone attacked me for it, I told them that the show wasn't interested in their opinion of me and if they couldn't give their opinion on the subject to "eff off" and mind their own business because I wasn't interested. I got no further comments from them so maybe that worked. I also find sometimes if someone attacks to attack back straight away with a smart comment and it will stop some people because they weren't expecting you to bite back.<br /><br />Another time I was attacked by several people, two were older, and the best thing I could do was make a joke out of it, so I posted in regards to their comments. One older woman shut up after a few comments and left, the other older woman went on to criticise my grammar, the way I wrote, that I must be young and accused me of getting off topic. When I politely put her in her place I got a half arsed apology from her and she left. Basically, she was making a dick of herself with her comments.<br /><br />The third woman was possibly my age or younger and she hated me so much for what I said that she went and checked out both of my FB pages, my Twitter, my blog, pretty much all of my social media, she shit over the amount of followers I had, shitted over what I wrote on my blog, accused me of all and every and so I joked about her being my stalker and how I was getting stalker love. That made her even more angry and it was ridiculous. And then some guy came along with one comment thanked her for outing the troll (me) and he was glad she had done it. I then replied to him with laughter and truth saying I had been under the same name for 5 years and used it across all of my social media and stood by my opinion so I was no troll. Got nothing else out of him either. I went and tracked it down, you can read it here - http://www.jewelsdiva.com.au/2013/02/this-week-i-got-called-bigot-for-daring.html<br /><br /><br /><br />I find that there are idiots in all age groups and all generations, it's just a matter of having a comeback when they attack. Some will be put in their place and others will continue the attack. It's a matter of whether you want to keep it going or leave it alone.Lady Jewels Divanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-73440112667081757042014-03-27T17:18:33.339-05:002014-03-27T17:18:33.339-05:00Wow. That photographer was sure a sleazeball. I ...Wow. That photographer was sure a sleazeball. I haven't run into any problems like this, although I'm sure some have unfriended me due to freely-expressed political views. I think Crabby Pants needs her own FB page. :)Jaynehttp://injaynesworld.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-73688973866292679852014-03-27T11:36:19.080-05:002014-03-27T11:36:19.080-05:00I agree that people have a tendency to not always ...I agree that people have a tendency to not always interpret things in the same way we meant it. That's true on our blogs as well. Especially when we are trying to be funny or clever. I once got into trouble saying that something was moronic. A got a beat down from someone accusing me of being anti-Mormon. (I am considering making Crabby Pants my spokesperson for this type of situation...what do you think?)<br /><br />I love making jokes but the downside of that is that there will always be someone that doesn't "get" that it is a joke. Wasn't it you that said we are nearly forced to put emoticons on anything that is supposed to be funny?<br /><br />You're welcome for the link...as far as badmouthing me, Go for it...you wouldn't be the first. ;)Cheryl P.http://artofbeingconflicted.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740338215172190519.post-22935978458045348192014-03-27T10:26:52.309-05:002014-03-27T10:26:52.309-05:00Is it wrong that I'd pay to see a good mommy b...Is it wrong that I'd pay to see a good mommy brawl?<br /><br />This is why I'm more of a Facebook lurker, or stalker, like you. It's sometimes hard to convey things over text, and people will snap and get nasty over the dumbest things, often when the other person isn't even trying to be mean and is just making a joke (like Sherry).<br /><br />I love to make jokes. I love to reply to people's comments with jokes. But I also hate pointless arguments. This is why I keep my funny thoughts either to myself or post them on the blog. I'm 100% certain they'd just be lost on the likes of Facebook.<br /><br />Oh, and thanks for putting up the link to our sale! We appreciate it a ton. But since you couldn't link the picture, I'm gonna head off to Facebook now and badmouth you... ;)abeerfortheshowernoreply@blogger.com