Thursday, July 5, 2012

Another Week of Mixed Nuts

Some weeks, when I am searching for my "odd" lesser-reported news, there seems to be some type of common thread.  Not this week.  I was off to a strong start with stories about boobs though...

Is This Appropriate Attire for a Robbery?

Somewhere in Australia there's a "buxom bandit" on the run. That's what Australian media has dubbed a gas station robber with an affinity for deadly weapons and low-cut shirts.

The local authorities aren't having quite as much fun making sport of the busty thief.  (Surely, one of those cops is dying to say "Let's bust her!")  She did commit crime with a deadly weapon, after all. She held up a Gold Coast gas station of about $200.00 before taking off with a male accomplice.

Clearly, she isn't a master-mind as criminals go, she had only one gloved hand and touch several objects with the ungloved hand.  Plus, she didn't cover her face.

Really, did she need to cover her face when she was wearing that outfit?  Who is looking at her face?

Teenager Not "Big" on Family Tradition

As I am always looking for "the classiest" of stories, this one didn't escape me. 

A story of out Britain, introduces us the the Marshall family.  Mom of nine, Chantal Marshall is in a number of newspapers this week talking about her 14 year old daughter,  Britney.  Mom is being quotes saying "Britney is going through a funny phase at the moment and saying she doesn't want to get her boobs done."

It seems the family has a tradition that the girls all get breast enhancement surgery.  Despite the urging of mom and her four sisters, Britney is not leaning toward "going under the knife" anytime soon.

Her mother, who is a professional psychic,  is holding out hope, though.  Chantal went on to say," I really love the fake look of my girls and I know Britney will go that way when she is a bit older.  I love the idea of us all looking similar and glamorous.

In total, the busty five-some had nearly three litres of silicone put in their breasts in 13 ops.

Only three litres??? I would have guessed more.  I am skeptical of Chantal's psychic ability.  If she really could see into the future she would have given a couple of her girls the heads up on "how big is too big?

Speaking of Big and Sad

Did all of you hear about the theft of the large fiberglass dinosaur last week up in Montana.  If not...let me catch you up.

On June 21st, Dino the  Sinclair dinosaur was stolen from the Hi-Noon Crossroads Travel Center in Missoula, Montana.
They were offering a $250 gas card for information leading to the safe return of the 12-foot-long fiberglass  dinosaur.
"We just wonder what happened to him," Hi-Noon marketing manager Earl Allen said Friday. "It's a little odd for him to just walk away." He went on to say, "It's not like you can just throw him in the back of a pickup."
Initially, when I heard of this story, I thought it was a prank and we would all see a cute pictures of Dino showing up at various places much like the frog or gnome pranks done in the past.  (Tell me you aren't aware of these.  Seriously??? That is how Travelocity came up with the traveling gnome idea.)

Although, I will admit that hauling around a 12 ft., 100 pound dinosaur might have been a bit trickier than a garden gnome.

But, this is another example of my optimism not being rewarded.  The dismembered body of Dino was found in some nearby woods and a decapitated head was found a couple of days later. All of Dino's pieces have been returned and according to the Hi-Noon spokesman, they believe he can be reassembled.

So many questions ....What kind of person steals a 12 ft. dinosaur and how can that go unnoticed??? And what was the point of the decapitating it??? Does this person have dinosaur rage issues?   Is this some type of hate crime???


Chubby Chatterbox said...

Sounds like a serial dinosaur killer to me. Brontosauruses everywhere are quaking with fear.

Cheryl P. said...

I think you may be right. Perhaps Universal Theme Park better up the security at the Juarrasic Park exhibit.

Nicky said...

The buxom bandit? All I can say is "What a boob!"
I don't even know what to say about Chantal Marshall. Seriously. Being disappointed because her 14-yr old daughter doesn't want ridiculously large, fake boobs. Somebody smack that woman, please.
Poor Dino. Has anybody questioned Fred Flintstone?

Cheryl P. said...

The buxom bandit is a boob indeed...but a boob with some serious boobs
Chantel needs slapped but those other daughters need a few slaps as well. That one on the left of mom is just WRONG...on so many levels...WRONG
Nah, it couldn't of been Fred. He uses Dino for his transportation to the gravel pit. More likely Bam Bam grew up to be a serial killer and is still fuming over Pebbles rejecting him.

Crack You Whip said...

Oh, I had to laugh at the "Buxom Bandit!" I'll be googling the story later. She may end up on "World's Dumbest."

Cheryl P. said...

I read that also, but the last I heard they hadn't caught her yet. That makes her smarter than a few million dumbasses that are behind bars. I can't imagine that it should be that hard to track her down...they have a picture of her accomplices car.

Linda Medrano said...

Now, Cheryl, I see the bandits point(s). When I have swollen eyes or a bad hair day, I always put on something very low cut. Nobody looks at my eyes or my squirrely hair when I am flashing boobage. Plus, mine are not made of gel or whatever.

Adventures of Muse said...

I can see how all 3 stories are intertwined, like a sexy brother-in-law, a goat, and a drunken neighbor at a family picnic. But I digress.
Clearly, one of the Marshall daughters from Britain IS the Buxom Bandit. Mystery 1-- solved. Next, the dinosaur raid? Also a victim of BB. Mystery 2-- solved.
As an aside, when I was a senior in high school (may have been when dinosaurs roamed the Earth-- nice tie-in, eh?) our class decided that for our senior prank we would steal the "Bob's Big Boy" ...
(here is a link in case you don't know what he is: )
.. and then we deposited him on our senior lawn for all to see. I distinctly remember that the Calculus teacher, Ms. Lamar, helped in some capacity (she owned a truck). Bob was, indeed, a BIG boy, and quite heavy. To this day, I have no idea how they managed to lift him.
ps-- I hear Ms. Lamar was finally released from prison. Thank God!

Cheryl P. said...

I think that is a wise strategy for those that don't want to draw attention to their face. It must have worked for the buxom bandit as she didn't get caught and the only thing the media is describing her by is her blonde hair and her boobs.
It would appear that the man-made variety in some cases is not the best look. Case in point the Marshall girl to the right of her mom in the pic.

Cheryl P. said...

First of all, let me say, that I am sorry that Disqus seems intent on putting you in the spam folder. I have no idea what that is about. Twice I have gone over to their site to have a little chat that you don't need to be approved. You are welcome any time over here. Sheeze, has Muse done something to get you in trouble with Disqus?
I think you are a genius at finding a conection to these stories. Probably with the skills you have acquired from dealing with the BIL, goat and drunken neighbors, it has made you a master at sizing up "less than normal" situations.
AS to the stealing Bob's Big Boy...I remember when those restaurants were all over the place with that odd gnomish- looking goof of a mascot standing in front of their diners, I am rather amazed that you and your classmates could pull that off. Would a normal pickup truck even hold one??
As a tribute to you and your fellow "most probably in jail by now" classmates, I went over to EBay to see if I could just send you a Bob's Big Boy statue for old times sake. As it is, the one that looks most promising is $3500.00. A bargain I am sure but with shipping and all, I guess the nerdy boy statue isn't destined to be your new lawn ornament. (well, unless maybe Ms. Lamar is still on parole and feeling nostalgic)

babs (beetle) said...

Which would look the least suspicious? A girl wearing a face mask, or a girl showing her boobs? Either way, you don't see the face.

That family MUST be from Essex. All Essex girls have long, bleached blond hair, fake tans, fake boobs and very little brains.

Cheryl P. said...

You make a very good point. Although, I doubt that the mask would have held anyone's gaze as long as the boobs did.
I have learned something new...Essex, huh??? If there are a lot of blonde, big boobed, tanned, less-than-brilliant girls, there must be a lot of horney boys there as well.

Cheryl P. said...

You make a very good point. Although, I doubt that the mask would have held anyone's gaze as long as the boobs did.
I have learned something new...Essex, huh??? If there are a lot of blonde, big boobed, tanned, less-than-brilliant girls, there must be a lot of horney boys there as well.

babs (beetle) said...

Oh yes and just as dim. Google 'Essex Girls'.

An Essex girl on Big Brother at the moment, genuinely didn't know that an egg was an unhatched baby chick. She thought hens gave birth to fully formed chicks and that an egg was just something extra that hens laid, for no other reason than for us to eat!

Cheryl P. said... doesn't get much dimmer than that. I will definitely be googling Essex girls.

Don E. Chute said...

OhSheeshFrigginGood Stuff! I think that Britney needs to talk to the 'BoobBandit' about what it's like to carry such a heavy burden...led her to a life of crime, right? Britney's mom has clearly moved her weight from her brain to her Boobs...The 3 of them could make a bundle on the talk show/book tour...The Dino thing is just weird...what kind of sicko would decapitate Dino? Clearly his head will pop in the news again...
PLU from SSF