Friday, September 14, 2012

Less Than a Full Tank

Dare, I start this week's round up by uttering a word that is considered by some to be a "dirty" word. Apple..there I said it.  Even the Apple loyalists might be a bit miffed this week.  Oh...not because of the impending release of the IPhone  5 ...they have been waiting ever so eagerly for is the realization that all the gadgets such as alarm clocks, docking stations, and speakers that they have accumulated will no longer work.  Apple changed the charger on this model of IPhone.

The reason I am bringing up the "ever so touchy" subject of Apple,  is that earlier this week the Temecula, California store was broken into by two bumbling burglars that seemed to be off their game.

It's So Hard to Leave

The less-than-efficient thieves and/or Apple product enthusiasts had the brilliant idea to drive their BMW through the front windows of the store and help themselves to all the shiny cool must-haves they could grab.  (who can blame them, really?...that logo just reels people in)

What the robbers didn't count on was a security gate that kept them from exiting once they were in there. While frantically trying to escape from the store,  two of the BMW's tires popped. (guess their next place to rob needs to be a Goodyear store).

As luck (bad) would have it, upon their exit they managed to drop their license plate.  This fact was noticed when the driver, Equonne R. Howard, stopped down at the 7-11 and tried to fix the tires with a stolen can of Fix-A-Flat. (Equonne just keeps making wise choices, huh?)

Alas, Equonne made his final mistake of the day when he decided to return to the Apple store to retrieve his license plate. The Riverside Sheriff's Office arrested him. He is being held on a $600,000.00 bond which coincidentally is the estimated damage to the store.

What was Equonne thinking????  The new IPhone isn't available until the week of the 27th.  If you are going to go to the trouble to steal at least wait for the newest technology.  

It's the Thought That Counts

Isn't it fun to get a greeting card?

A former nursing student in San Diego has pleaded guilty to helping inmates sneak in meth-laced greeting cards into jail.

I think the card that says "hi" meant "high"
Nicoll Koval had already been sentenced and imprisoned for her involvement in a hit-and-run- incident that she was convicted of in 2011 (seems she has a problem with staying out of trouble)

Proving herself to be a good team player, while in prison she conspired with a fellow inmate to smuggle in greeting cards that had been soaked in liquid meth, dried out and sent to other inmates. Inmates that recieved the cards would then heat them up to  release the meth.  (do jail cells have stoves/microwaves now?)

Gretchen von Helms, Koval's lawyer, said her client was tricked into participating in the scheme.

What's better than a greeting card that plays music?  I think we have an answer now.  I can't get over the fact that people in jail are cooking up a pot of greeting cards and no one thinks that's odd.

Not Exactly a First Class Seat

This story will end any lingering questions as to what is the worst seat on a plane. If you think it is in the back row next to the would be wrong. The real answer is is the seat that this little monkey had on a trip to India. The monkey in question is a loris It is a small nocturnal species of monkey that is gaining popularity as a pet.  The poor little guy was traveling in the in the underwear of a man attempting to board a flight at New Delhi's international airport. Customs officials arrested an Indian man with a monkey in his underwear.

That was the worst trip ever. 
The man was detained with two other travelers that had arrived from Bangkok and were trying to get on their connecting flight to Dubai. The monkey was discovered during a security check.

Customs authorities in India  arrested all three men who were attempting to board the flight and found a second loris in the underwear of the second man and yet another loris they had stashed in a trash bin when they were unable to keep it hidden. The men are accused of smuggling endangered primates. All the animals were turned over to an organization that deals with wildlife and conservation. 

There is just so many things wrong with this story!!  The security check was prompted because an official noticed an unusual bulge in a traveler's pants.  Really?  How often can that be said as the reason you get patted down?  This monkey had taken a flight from Bangkok to New Delhi and no one noticed anything unusual?

And One More for the Road

Americans do love their bacon and that will be put to the test over the next week or so.  A promotion of a new line of bacon called Butcher Thick Cut Bacon by Oscar Mayer has one man traveling across the country without any money, without any charge cards, nothing  but 3000 pounds of bacon to use as barter.

Josh Sankey will be traveling from New York City to Los Angeles using nothing but bacon to acquire food, lodging and fuel. He is due to arrive in LA on September 23rd.

Sankey is chronicling his trip on his Twitter Account Account and on a web site Bacon Barter.  As of last Wednesday he was in Louisville, KY where he had bartered some bacon for a nights stay in someones basement.  His host got a new bacon themed tattoo to support his guest's cause. 

Evidently the Ritz isn't taking bacon for their rooms. If you are craving some thick sliced bacon you might want to reach out to Josh and invite him over for the night.  I wonder how much bacon it takes to fill up a gas tank these days?


Bodaciousboomer said...

Just after college a guy asked me if I wanted to see the one-eyed snake in his pants. Of course I thought he just being weird. Now I wonder if he really was smuggling a reptile. Perhaps I was over suspicious...

Cheryl P. said...

I think you were right to ignore such a well thought out pick up line. I am pretty sure what he was wanting to show you was run-of-the-mill... not one-of-a-kind. He sounds charming. (gag)

Chubby Chatterbox said...

Bacon is okay, but nothing to pop a gut over. Unless you're popping it out cause that stuff's loaded with calories.

Linda R. said...

Ah, returning to the scene of the crime is never a good idea. Fortunately they were not that smart.

Bacon rules!!

Margaret said...

I'm betting it takes a whole lotta bacon to fill up a gas tank at today's prices.

And I'm guessing the Apples thieves didn't exactly get straight A's in school.

momto8blog said...

oh my gosh..the nurse, the cards, the meth..could not even make this stuff up.

Cheryl P. said...

I agree that I wouldn't be too excited to be paid for something in bacon but I bet Josh might be fun to visit with. Seems like a pretty funny guy.

Cheryl P. said...

So right you are, Linda. Not the smartest move for a criminal to go back to the site of the crime but I suspect if he were really smart he wouldn't be a thief.

I love bacon but I think as a currency, I would rather have money... with which, of course, I might buy some bacon.

Cheryl P. said...

I am betting you are right on both of your observations. I would wager some bacon on it.

Cheryl P. said...

Don't you wonder how people discover this stuff. Do they just have an epiphany one day and say lets manufacture liquid meth so we can make a line of greeting cards. Caarrraaaazzzy

meleahrebeccah said...

* I am dying laughing at the Apple store thieves.

* "I can't get over the fact that people in jail are cooking up a pot of greeting cards and no one thinks that's odd."
Um…. those inmates sure are crafty, huh?

* Who the FUCK puts a LIVE monkey in their pants? OMFG!!!

* And, I would totally let the bacon dude stay at my house.

Cheryl P. said...

Really, I couldn't believe how stupid they were to get in there and get stuck.

I am confused how that happens. Wouldn't guards or someone notice greeting cards boiling on the stove. One would be suspicious if all the inmates were volunteering for kitchen duty.

Poor little monkeys. I think PETA needs to get busy and protest this.

I would too. I think it would be great fun to visit with this guy. I wouldn't even charge him the bacon.