Friday, June 8, 2012

And the Award Goes To

Another week and another group of  "lesser reported" news stories.  This week I have decided to have an awards show of sorts.  Best in category if you will....

Award for the Most Unusual Pharmacy

If you can't go to the pharmacy, bring the pharmacy with you.  At least that is what a New York woman tried to do.

This is part of the inventory that was taken from Andrea's stash.
Who knew hoohas were so roomy?
Before Andrea Amanatides was set to begin a six-month sentence for a probation violation, she allegedly filled a condom with 256 prescription pills including 90 pills of Lyrica, 37 Adderall tablets, 50 Valiums, 43 Trazadones, 10 Ambiens and 26 Oxycontins, added four bags of heroin and put the condom in her vagina. (I don't believe that is a prescribed use for vaginas)

While she was waiting in an Albany County Jail holding cell, the contraband-filled condom apparently broke and one of the pills fell onto the floor. A surveillance video of Amanatides seems to show that when she tried to adjust her pill-filled groin, more pills fell out and rolled to floor from her pants leg.

Amanatides was charged with five misdemeanor counts of criminal possession of a controlled substance and felony promotion of prison contraband. She was arraigned in Colonie Town Court and sent back to county jail.

I have to believe the police did her a big favor by relieving her of her stash.  If she was put into the general population jail with her pharmacy still in place, I think the other prisoners would be entering illegally to get some of the drugs.

Award for the Most Irate Ex-Girlfriend

A North Carolina woman is facing a malicious castration charge (there is a charge you don't hear of everyday)  after she allegedly squeezed the scrotum of a 59-year-old acquaintance so vigorously that one of the victim’s testicles was dislodged, according to police.
The victim told Shelby Police Department officers that he was attacked early Saturday morning by Joyce Maxine Gregory, with whom he had been arguing in his apartment.  According to cops, Gregory and the man had previously been in “some sort of a romantic relationship.”
As detailed in a wince-inducing police report, the victim told cops that Gregory “grabbed him by his scrotum” in a vise-like grip. While he was able to “jerk away from her grip,” the man freed himself after Gregory had succeeded in squeezing a testicle out of his scrotum.
Officer M. L. McPherson reported that the victim’s “scrotum had been split open,” adding that, “I was also able to observe one of the subject’s testicles protruding from the scrotum area.”
Along with malicious castration, Gregory was charged with assault causing serious bodily injury (both counts are felonies). Now locked up in the county jail in lieu of $20,000 bond, Gregory is scheduled for a June 18 court hearing.

  On the way to jail, she removed her pants and urinated on the back seat of the patrol car.  She is also, receiving awards in the category of most "Unlady-Like Behavior" and an honorable mention in the category of "Vicious Bitches".

It's a Tie...Awards for Being the Worst Parents of the Week.

First Award in this Category for the Week....

Chicago police received a surprise this week when they reportedly found a three-year-old girl holding a handgun during a routine traffic stop.

An officer in Chicago pulled a car of six people over in East Garfield Park, a  community on the west side of Chicago, last Wednesday. Two children were seated in the vehicle sans any type of car seat or restraints. 

As the police approach the car, they noticed that the driver, Queshawn King was frantically making movement towards a three year old girl while yelling out her name, "Fatty",  multiple times.

A police sergeant approached the little girl who was seated on the front passenger side of the car and saw that she was holding a 9 mm handgun. The sergeant tried to retrieve the weapon but the little girl tossed the gun onto the floor. Luckily the gun didn't discharge, although the car was loaded with 8 rounds.

King was charged with felony unlawful use of a weapon for having a loaded weapon inside the vehicle, misdemeanor endangering the life and health of a child, and misdemeanor possession of a firearm without a valid license.

I would add multiple charges for the fact, he called a little girl Fatty.  Really???  It's bad enough to make your three year old a gun moll but naming a child Fatty....he should get life.

Second Award For Bad Parent of the Week
 A marijuana-smoking woman was arrested on Saturday in Phoenix after she accidentally drove away with her five-week-old son in a child safety seat on the roof of her vehicle, police said.
The baby fell off the car in the middle of an intersection, albeit unnoticed by the driver/mother.  The baby was found unharmed and  still strapped into the seat, said Phoenix police spokesman James Holmes.
The mother Catalina Clouser was booked into jail on child abuse and aggravated assault charges, he said. The infant was taken to a local hospital as a precaution and is in the custody of state Child Protective Services.
According to the report, earlier in the day, Clouser and her boyfriend had been smoking marijuana in a park when they decided to go for a beer run taking the infant with them.  They, however, got stopped and the boyfriend was arrested for driving under the influence.
Clouser was so upset that she went over to a friend's house smoke some more marijuana. At about midnight she got into her car to leave.  The problem, however, is that she had placed the baby still in the car seat up on top of the car before driving off.
Clouser apparently did not realize that the baby was missing until she arrived home.

***Shaking my head**** Really, could this chick have made any more bad decisions in a one day period? Smoking weed and needing a beer chaser, letting boyfriend drive under the influence with your kid "in" the car, (as opposed to on the roof),  setting baby on  the roof of car, driving under the influence,  and not noticing a baby falling off the roof of a car.  Is it wrong that the only positive thing I see in the story is that she at least uses a car seat?


Thechubbychatterbox said...


Great post as always. Check out my post today where I mention your blog.

meleahrebeccah said...

1. Well, kudos for trying to the pill-condom-vagina chick!

2. I'm crossing my legs just reading about the scrotum grabber. YIKES.

3. What the what? A THREE YEAR OLD named FATTY was holing a 9m gun? That's INSANE.

4. And that's why I don't smoke weed. Ya never know when you're going to accidentally leave a baby on the roof of your car! WTF!!!

Cheryl P. said...

1. The only thing that could have made that story better is if she would of had prescriptions for all the drugs (well maybe not the heroine, but the rest) up her va-jay-jay as well.

2. Seriously..wince and cringe

3. Agreed..Insane..that little girl is going to need a shrink some day.

4. Agreed...WTF

Cheryl P. said...

BTW...Hope you are feeling better today!!!!

Nicky said...

How hysterical is it that Andrea tried to sweep the pills away with her foot!! Like nobody would notice the pile of pills under the bench!! Bwahahahaha!

Joyce gives a whole new meaning to "bad breakup".

Seriously, they need to legally change Queshawn's name to Fatty as part of her sentence. That, or Stupid. And Catalina should have to ride to prison on top of the bus.

Cheryl P. said...

Yes, I think Andrea is a little short on common sense. I can't imagine that she didn't see the problem arise as how she might get those pills out one at a time when needed. Maybe her hooha works as a dispenser.

Joyce must have hands of steel.

Fatty would be too kind of name for Queshawn. I vote for Dumbass.

I like that idea of the bus ride, but keep in mind she needs to fall off in the middle of an intersection.