It's In The Details

 As I was reading all the odd little news stories this week, I wasn't necessarily surprised by the subject matter of the stories.  Many of the themes of "people being idiots" and "making bad choices" are pretty commonplace.  I did happen to notice odd little details within some of the stories this week.

BTW...While I TRY to keep my posts fairly PG rated, it seems that the majority of odd news this week contained a bit of perversion on the part of our delusional criminals.  Be forewarned that today, the rating will be NC17.

You Lost Me at Hello

A Massachusetts man, who police allege spent two days underneath a woman’s mobile home watching and taping her while she was in the bathroom, was arrested last night by New Hampshire cops.

According to Salem police, the woman told them that Christian Hobbs, 44, had sold her the trailer a couple of years ago but had recently done some work for her at the home. Investigators determined that at that time Hobbs “snuck under the trailer and cut holes in the floor and then in the floor vent under the bathroom” while installing two baby monitors in the residence she shares with her toddler-aged son.

After the woman noticed movement in the ducts she peered in and saw Hobbs looking up at her. According to the  police report he “simply said ‘hello.’”

Hobbs later told investigators “’I did it, it was me under the trailer.’” Further investigation determined that “he had been under the trailer for nearly 2 days with food, beverages, tissues,  (EWWW)  while observing.

Charged with manufacture of child porn, wiretapping, prowling, trespass, and burglary, Hobbs remains locked up in the Rockingham County jail on $25,000 bail. He is due to appear in court on August 27 for a probable cause hearing.

So this woman is looking down through the floor vent and there is a face of a guy named Christian (really inappropriate name for this particular guy) and all he can think to say is "HELLO". I am thinking that isn't creative enough for the situation.  How about.... Guess who?... Surprise? or maybe..."Don't mind me, I am just working on my plumbing."

 Rulz for Hoez


During a raid on the Long Island home of an alleged pimp, cops recovered a handwritten list of ten management rules to follow when turning women out on the street, investigators report. (and who better to give us rules...oops, I mean rulz, than a pimp who is spelling-challenged.)

In announcing today’s arrest of eight defendants for their alleged roles in a prostitution and heroin ring, Suffolk County prosecutors released a copy of “Rule's 2 Da game of Hoez!!!”


The list, which investigators allege was prepared by Steven McDaniel, was recovered from the  home he shares with Sandra Russell. McDaniel. Sandra, additionally has been accused of paying her hookers with heroin.
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Rules cited in the list include:
* Keep your bi on the law as possible when it come's 2 family and hater's (caus you can't trust none of  them)
* No matter how much you like or care for 1 or any of them, don’t trust none of them.”
* Make them understand that you don’t need them they need you, and they are replaceable.”
* Follow these rule's,” the list concludes, “and you should b Gucci.”

Don't we all want to be Gucci? Interesting that he knows how to spell Gucci but doesn't know how to spell "know".


What a Croc

Arrested Saturday on a drunk driving charge after he was found passed out at the wheel of his Porsche, a multimillionaire founder of the Crocs shoe empire told Colorado cops that his girlfriend, Taylor Swift, (he wishes) had actually been driving the vehicle, according to a police report.

When Boulder Police Department cops challenged him about the whereabouts of his purported girlfriend, George Boedecker claimed that she had bolted from the vehicle after they got into an argument. He went on to tell  Officer Patrick Vest that his girlfriends is "a really f****** famous singer". When Officer Vest asked where Taylor might be after leaving the car, Boedecker pointed to a backyard and said "she is in Nashville." He went on to say that his girlfriend is "batshit crazy".  (Seems they would have that in common.)

After telling the police in a variety of ways to do something that is anatomically impossible, Boedecker was taken to jail.  The police report noted that he was wearing flip-flops at the time of the arrest.

Seems the founder of Crocs doesn't wear crocs...or at least when he is getting arrested.   How drunk does someone have to be to think that Taylor Swift is driving their Porsch? 

You be the Judge

A South Florida man with an unfortunate name (or an unfortunate sense of humor) was arrested last Friday on a litany of charges in Fort Lauderdale.

Jackmeoff Mudd, was arrested on charges of assault, disorderly conduct, resisting an officer, possession of alcohol in an open container, and violation of probation.
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He is being held at a Broward County jail on a $300 bond, which means that at some point in the last few days, a judge in a county courthouse will have to say:

The State of Florida VS Jackmeoff Mudd


Anyone willing to take bets on if the courtroom remains quiet?

OH NO, I am one of those!

Normally, I would say, I try not to be too "grandparenty".  (I realize that isn't actually a word.....but it should be.)  That is to say, I try not to be that person that gives you a blow by blow accounting of what my children and grandchildren are doing this minute.   I am sure you couldn't care less but still,  this is a personal blog.  With the confines of writing what is upper-most on my mind for the week, this is what you are stuck with...a couple of thoughts about my children and grandchildren.

The main reason, I am particularly focused on my daughter and her two sons is that all three are celebrating birthdays this week.  The only thing that would have made this better is if my son-in-law would have had an August birthday as well.  Surely he feels left out.  (I am certain that his parents would have timed this better had they known.)

Thought Number One...How Quickly Time Goes By

my baby's picture at 3 months old.

This little cutey grew up to be the sweetest daughter on the planet.  Oh, I know some of you are saying "WHOA.... that can't be, because my daughter is" ...let's just agree to disagree.

This week my wonderful daughter and her precious babies are celebrating birthdays.

G-Boy #1 is turning 5 and G-Boy #2 is turning 2

Number 11 isn't ours...But the Royal fan and the kid with his binky are definitely ours.

I see you!

Seems G-"Boy #1 likes getting wet

Thought #2--- Now I know, I was just saying about how I don't go on and on with "grandma" stories....but I still have to have a 2nd thought. That thought may be that I lied in the beginning of this post.

Little brother holds big brother's hand while he takes his nap.

Last week we had a couple of funny things happen in the car.  (one of them is the hand holding incident)

The other incident that had us laughing was a conversation that happened on the way to supper last week. Grandpa and I were taking the boys out for a burger when the little G-boy #2 started jabbering about something.  We, however, were not understanding what he was saying.  So we asked his brother to translate for us.

 ME:  What is your little brother saying?

G-Boy 1:  I don't know.  He is speaking Chinese.

ME:  Really??? Why would he be speaking in Chinese?

 G-Boy #1:  Because he was made in China.

ME:  No sweety, I don't think your little brother was made in China.  Why would you say that?

G-Boy#1:  Because just about everything is made in China.

Where do kids get this stuff????





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Freebies, Freaks, and Friday

Here we are, my friends...another Friday with another week has come and gone.  Were you glued to the television this week watching the Summer Olympics?  It seems that while many of us were focused on sportsman-like competition of few people were focused on other pursuits.

Wheels  of SUV Move Faster than Wheels of Justice

The attorney of a Utah woman charged with ramming an SUV through an office building to hit her estranged husband says she was on a large amount of anxiety medication and was "not in her right mind."

Attorney Jason Schatz made the argument Tuesday during the start of the trial for 36-year-old Brenda Christine White.

"On that day, Brenda White's body was behind the wheel of that Ford Explorer," Schatz said. "What's in dispute is why this happened."

The incident happened in 2006 but there have been several appeals because her defense attorneys have appealed to use the argument that White was under extreme emotional distress.

Authorities said White hit her ex-husband twice with her Ford Explorer after crashing through the office building in Salt Lake County.

Jon Robert White said he initially ran from a parking garage when he saw his ex-wife in the SUV. He said he ran between two parked cars, jumped over a concrete wall, and into an office, before his ex-wife crashed through the glass doors and hit him. He said he got up and ran but she drove down a hallway and chased him, hitting him again.

He said he hid in a closet until a maintenance man found him.

Brenda White's attorneys say she did not intend to kill her ex-husband. Schatz said she suffered from panic attacks and anxiety and on that day she had taken a lot of medication.

"At some point in our lives we have all done or said something that we wouldn't have done if we were in total control of our body," Schatz said.


Speak for yourself, Schatz! I might of done some stupid asinine things that I now regret but I was in control of my body...it was more my brain was not under control. Still, not once have I driven my Explorer through the hallways of an office building.

The man seems pretty good at dodging his lunatic ex-wife. Perhaps he has had
practice.

Hot Dog! They're Free


If you were walking around the streets of Manhattan, NY this week you might of thought there were new hot dog vendors hawking their dogs on the street. 




 Upon closer inspection...you would realize that hot dogs are not the product at these carts.

The makers of Trojan Vibrations personal pleasure devices are distributing their wares for free on New York streets with a cart modeled after a hot dog vendor.

The company said its Trojan Vibrations Pleasure Carts will distribute a total 10,000 vibrators during the month of August.

 Bruce Weiss, vice president of marketing for Trojan Sexual Health. "We're always looking for ways to advance this effort by fostering an open dialogue about sexual health and creating unique moments that get people 'buzzing' (buzzing...really?) about sex and pleasure."

Interesting job Mr. Weiss has "creating unique moments" to get people talking about sex. I bet some people have gotten arrested for trying to do that.

Boyfriend Was Being a A Pain in the Ass

A Pennsylvania woman with a severely sunburned butt, stabbed her boyfriend with a large steak knife after he slapped her rear end while she was doing the dishes in her home, cops report.


According to the police report, Tiffany Sherry was cleaning the dishes when her boyfriend, Michael Martinez, “slapped her in the buttocks.” Martinez told a Bethlehem cop that he did this as a “joke” since he “was aware Sherry had sunburn in the area.”

Sherry, however, did not find this amusing and “became immediately agitated.”

Martinez told cops that “Sherry turned around from the sink and was holding a large steak knife.” As he backed away, Martinez recalled, Sherry followed him into the living room. He then asked her, “What are you going to do, stab me in front of your children?” (there's a problem!)

After directing her two children to leave the room,  (there's a solution to above stated problem) Sherry allegedly “poked” Martinez in the abdomen with the knife, and then stabbed him in the shoulder. Before stabbing him a third time, “Sherry screamed, ‘I’m going to f****** kill you.'” (why she felt the need to clarify this point, I am not sure...as I think it is pretty clear what her intentions are)

When cops arrived at Martinez’s residence, they found him bleeding from a stomach wound and observed “two distinct cuts to the front and rear of [his] right shoulder area.” Martinez was transported to a local hospital for treatment.

Sherry has a prior arrest on her record. She was busted in 2008 after allegedly stabbing a man with a fork during an argument over diapers, She remained in jail on a $25,000.00 bond on this current charge.

Anyone willing to take a bet that her next arrest will involve the use of a spoon?

Baby For Sale



Not the only baby to ever show up on Craig's List

 A Canadian woman called police when she found an online ad offering her baby for sale based on photos she'd posted on Facebook.

The unidentified woman in the central British Columbia town of Fort St. John called the Royal Canadian Mounted Police when she spotted the ad in an online buy-and-sell site, the Canadian Broadcasting Corp. reported.

RCMP Sgt. Steve Perret told the broadcaster the ad had been removed this week and electronic forensic investigators had a suspect.

"To me, this looks like a case of somebody's twisted or perverted sense of humor, by posting these types of ads trying to sell somebody else's child," he said. "Additionally there was an ad where he was trying to sell a dead dog."

The woman had posted pictures of her baby on Facebook, which were copied for use in the ad, the CBC said.

 

I don't know why this one struck me odd.  I have seen all kinds of interesting things for sale on Craig's List and Ebay.  I haven't noticed any of my minor relatives...or the dead dog but be sure to email me if you see either of those things. I think the down side to this lady seeing her baby's picture is if people were showing more interest in purchasing the dead dog. That could hurt someone's feelings.