Tuesday, February 12, 2013

The Truth is in There Somewhere

Last Friday, in my odd news wrap-up for the week, I told you about the 10 year boy  boy being charged with a misdemeanor charge for carrying a toy gun on his school bus. Then...as it happens, another story comes across the news  that deals with a similar use of "play" weaponry.

Thought Number One: What IS the REAL story??

At first glance, the story out of Loveland, CO would have us all shaking our heads thinking it is a case of gross overreaction to  harmless school yard play. As new facts emerge, however,  there seems to be some confusion what exactly happened.

Initially, Mandie Watkins, a mother of a second grader, Alex Watkins, said she received a phone call from the principle of Mary Blair Elementary saying that her son had received a suspension for throwing an IMAGINARY grenade on the playground.  According to Alex he did throw the make-believe grenade to "save the world" and he included the sound effects of  psssshhh. As you might imagine, with the release of that story...Moms were losing their minds. (not just moms for that matter, Kiddo #2 AKA my son called with his comments as well.)  WHAT the WHAT...we are talking IMAGINARY grenade, right?

The story spread through the media with the speed akin to a  lighted fuse that was laced with an accelerant. The personnel of Mary Blair, however, said they were unable to comment due to privacy issues.  The pesky rules that come with Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act were causing the school to remain "mum" on the subject.



Now after nearly two weeks of having the media and the general population bombarding them with "What the Hell is wrong with you people?",  the school district is making limited statements. A statement was sent to the Coloradoan stating that Alex was taken to the principle's office after the alleged actions. (there seems to now be varying accounts as to what those actions were) but he wasn't ever removed from the school grounds. 

click to enlarge
A spokesman for the school district, Mike Hausmann, said that the school did suspend Alex but the facts of the suspension are inaccurate.  He says, "He (Alex) was not suspended for having an imaginary weapon." Although in a meeting on Tuesday, the district did point out that there is a  written guideline for the school called the "Absolutes".   Superintendent Stan Scheer said these rules are an enhancement to the district's policies of conduct.   The Absolutes state that there are to be no weapons, real or play and that a third instance of violation there is a suspension.

So now the story takes another change.  He did get a suspension but for what?? In yet another meeting the school says he was seen throwing rocks. Mandie Watkins claims that the school changed it's story because of the negative public reaction.   She is adamant that the only thing her son threw was an imaginary grenade.

BUT WAIT...not so fast.....Channel 7 News ran a story with an indepth analysis pertaining to the fact that Alex's mom has a rather extensive criminal history.  She has been convicted of several felonies, charged with others and pleaded no contest to a couple more.  The news report asks the question " is Mrs. Watkin's version credible?"

For her part, Mrs. Watkins says that she would be glad to discuss her past mistakes but she isn't lying about this.She says she was clearly told her son was suspended for the IMAGINARY grenade launch...ppppsssshhhh.  She has removed her children from the school and has asked for  changes in the Absolutes. She and others believe the wording of the rules inhibit imagination and creativity.



YES, Crabby realizes there isn't camphor in moth balls sold in the U.S. anymore but she has her sources.

Thought Number Two:  No matter who did what, said what,....should there be rules that make imaginary play an offense that could lead to suspension or expulsion???



One of the other aspects of this particular story, deals with Colorado's laws that deal with zero-tolerance.  After the Columbine shooting many schools enacted very strict, zero-tolerance rules.  However, last year Senate Bill 12-45 was passed.  The bill which is known as Smart School Discipline Act,  requires school districts to implement "proportionate" discipline in addition prevention strategies, counseling, restorative justice and peer mentoring programs.

The idea behind the bill was to reduce the number of unnecessary suspensions.   Following the bill's guidelines the schools are supposed to consider the child's age, whether they have a disability, their disciplinary history,  the seriousness of the violation, other punishment options, and whether the action threatened the safety of another student or teacher.

The Thompson School District which the district that Mary Blair Elementary is part of believes the Absolutes are in compliance with Bill 12-45.



 Thought Number 2.5....What is the real story behind any news release?  After all the dramatizing, sensationalizing, pandering to the public's desire for exciting  stories... how newsworthy is the news? How often are the initial news releases full of misinformation?









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41 comments:

Liggybee said...

A lot other areas have these zero tolerance rules in place at their schools nowadays but some of them follow the rules a little too ridiculously because they are not written in enough detail to properly address every possible scenario. I think there needs to be better wording on them to include other situations and/or issues. Not everything should be blanketed into one specific policy when there are other issues (mental/psychological, etc.) that need to be addressed. Just my two cents!

Wendy said...

Sigh. I don't know if Crabby Pants should have taken up this crusade. Camphor Girl will wear out her cool spanking new costume within the month. (ooops, did I say spanking...is that word allowed?). It seems to me,and maybe kiddo #2 of yours,and definitely all of mine, might say that much of this zero tolerance relates to youthful male behaviour, that has no disrespect intended. Yes yes, I dare bring up that gender issue. Real hurt typically comes from Words said, not silliness in play. PLAY. Oh dear, have I said another naughty word? Off to sit in the corner.....

Just Keepin' It Real Folks said...

What happened to the good ol' days when we would play cops and robbers, act like we were shooting each other with our fingers and play dead? No one thought twice about it. If you got out of line your teacher would spank you and then your parents would spank you twice as hard when you got home. It was a much simpler time back in the dark ages. By the way, Balls is way cool.

Cheryl P. said...

Yes, the zero-tolerance policies and the 3 strikes laws are written so loosely or stringently (depending how they are viewed) that they can't cover every situation. I think Colorado's Bill 12-45 is brilliant to throw out the option for evaluating the entire scenario based on all the criteria before proceeding to judgement/punishment. With all the possible situations that could happen....as you pointed out some could even by mental/psychological...some common sense has to be used.



As for Crabby's costumes. I usually start with a wardrobe idea out of an actual clothing website. Then I take a Crabby in her underpanties and draw the basic outline in Gimp of whatever I am dressing her in. I Photoshop the fabric to the outline. I then put her back into Gimp to fine-tune all of her shape, paint the parts that need painted like her headband and boots. Way more than you wanted to know, I'll bet. But that's how I dress all my characters.

Cheryl P. said...

Wendy, as always..awesome comments. haahahaha Yes, I do suspect that Crabby Pants will be wearing herself out if she is to try to "crusade for honest and factual reporting". I am not sure if the word "spanking" is allowed anymore. I guess we will know if the PC police come to arrest us. There is probably a zero-tolerance policy for half the stuff in my posts.



Yes, some of this overreaction to behaviors target little boys behaviors. One of the big problems with that is I don't get the impression that adults are teaching little boys "why" they are in trouble. How can a 7 or a 10 year old know pretend gun play has a negative connotation.


So come out of that corner, my friend. Any naughty words you may or may not of said, make perfect sense. Oh, dear, is common sense, still allowed???

Cheryl P. said...

Boy are those days LLLLOOOONNNGGGG gone. Can you even imagine if in that story, someone from Mary Blair would of spanked this child?? Holy hell, it would be on the front page of every newspaper in the country.


I think the overall answer is that wiser heads have to prevail. Harmless play is ...well...harmless. If someone his being hurtful, there needs to be a realistic discipline. I'm not against time-outs, or even suspensions but the punishment needs to fit the crime. Pretend play shouldn't be a crime.



Hhahhahah Balls being cool taken out of context is funny.

Chubby Chatterbox said...

Punishing a kid for throwing an imaginary grenade in insane. This is what kids do--pretend! Children understand pretend---but do these administrators?

Cheryl P. said...

If one is to believe the initial reports, I would say that the school seriously overreacted but then you have to wonder was this just a case of the media making a mountain out of a molehill to have some drama in the headlines.



I would love to be privy to the real story. This had to be a 3rd offense for Alex to get suspended. What exactly was the behavior in question. The school says they can't discuss it but the mom insists that the imaginary grenade is the impetus for her kids suspension. Somewhere in the she said, he said and they said is the truth.

lisleman said...

Maybe the problem here is that we (as in people who don't know anything about this elementary school) have been given a poorly researched story. Sure we can't expect every story to be presented in a manner suitable for a trial but it would be nice if the media didn't jump to report with the flimsy bits of fact.

Annmarie Pipa said...

oh my gosh...although i am not really so surprised. the difference in what my kids can bring to school or say in school has changed dramatically since my older kids were in school. everything is now deemed a weapon and there are no reference to gender...

Linda R. said...

I think that rule is a bit (or a lot) over the top. Kids have been playing with imaginary friends and imaginary toys since forever. No one has ever gotten shot, stabbed or blown up by something that doesn't exist. Just my opinion, of course.

babs (beetle) said...

I know that the thinking behind no toy weapons is that, in an ideal world children wouldn't want to play at killing and maiming others and grow up to be mass murderers, but it has always been. As tiny kids we played at 'cowboys & Indians', TV is full of violence. Cartoons are often violent. We can't expect children to not mimic what they see around them all the time. How can a child switch it all off at school? Until they remove violence from our TV's and movies, they can't stop children playing at it.

Riot Kitty said...

What is the real story? Who knows? I don't think "zero tolerance" is a good one-size fits all in most cases, though. Unless you're talking about death and destruction...or in my case, enchiladas.

Cheryl P. said...

I totally agree, I think the media often jumps on a story to get it out first but doesn't have all the facts. I suspect the truth lies somewhere between the mom, the school, the kid and the news reports.

Cheryl P. said...

You would be a wealth of information on how things have changed. It's been a long time since my kids were in school. I am sure there have been so many changes, I would be lost in what is allowed and what isn't.



I am not prepared to say that the kid's suspension was solely about the imaginary grenade but it is interesting that the rules (Absolutes) clearly say imaginary play is forbidden in their list. That would be a hard thing to enforce.

Cheryl P. said...

I don't think you are alone in that opinion. Whether or not this particular child is in trouble or not because of the imaginary grenade, there are some rules on the list (Absolutes) that over the top. Pretend anything is a subjective thing.

Cheryl P. said...

You bring up a really interesting point. If kids are seeing gun and war play on TV, movies and even cartoons, they are going to mimic (pretend) those types of actions. I don't think we can have it both ways. Immerse our kids in a culture and then punish them for thinking about what they have been exposed to.



You are right, also in the fact, that this isn't new. We played cobs and robbers, and such and new the difference between make-believe and real. How did all of this get so off track???

Cheryl P. said...

At this point, I think it is clear that NO ONE knows the whole story. I, also, don't like the idea of zero-tolerance. I thing the Colorado bill that says each instance needs to take certain factors into account is a great idea. One-size fits all...yes, death and destruction, yes...enchiladas...but let's also include buttercream frosting.

L.C. Griffith said...

I love Crabby Pants aka Camphor Girl and her skulky sidekick, Balls. LOL!! As for the news, nothing surprises me any more. About a year ago a first grade boy got suspended for sexual harassment. The offense was stealing a kiss from his golden haired crush. Now really! Isn't that a right of passage? Phooey! I'm fixing to team up with Balls and Camphor Girl!
XO

Aleta said...

I think there should be various degrees of discipline, but no tolerance either. Meaning, at any stage of what the child does when it comes to violence or threats of violence, there is a form of punishment.
My Mom just recently retired from teaching, after working in the public school system for 37 years. A couple of years ago, a child in the 5th grade at her school, went around stating, "I'm going to kill all of you! I have a gun." Though the child was brought to the principal's office, no weapon was found. Nothing was done, other than to contact the parents. Two years later, that child is attending the school next to the school where my Mom used to work. The child is now in the 7th grade, brings a gun to school and kills another student.
Did this child learn anything in the 5th grade? Could he have learned something if better action had been taken? Imagination is one thing but what lead to the imagination might one day lead to reality.
http://www.fleurdealeta.blogspot.com

babs (beetle) said...

I think it started with all the PC rubbish. Some of it was good, then they got carried away with EVERYTHING! Now we can't do anything for fear of hurting or offending someone. It has finally spread down to little kids now. It's ludicrous! We will all live in little bubbles one day, so no interaction with others is possible. Then everyone will be politically correct :)

Jayne said...

Multiple 24-hour cable "news" stations with insatiable appetites. They'll throw any crap on the air these days. If only there was a 24 hour "silly news" station where stories like this could air. On the other hand, an imaginary grenade? WTF?

Cheryl P. said...

You're right, my friend...this keeps coming up in the news time and time again...some innocent act from a child that is made out to be "too much".


When I Google this story, 4 or 5 other related stories came up as well. Where did common sense run off to. It's probably hiding out with overreaction and drama.

Cheryl P. said...

I agree that every situation that hints of violence needs to be dealt with but somewhere there needs to be an evaluation of "was it harmful or harmless". That is why I think the 12-45 Bill is good to point out that every instance needs to be handled independently.


I am still convinced that no one has the complete story about the Loveland, CO boy. He was suspended but it was an "in school" suspension and it is still unclear what he actually did.



I do have a problem with how the "Absolutes" are written. One set of rules just doesn't cover all the possible situations. I don't like the idea of inserting "play" in the rules either. That needs to be clearly defined as to the parameters of what kind of play. If a kid says "bang, I gotcha" is it that same as "I am going to kill you."?


This is a very complicated issue as to what is allowable and how discipline is to be dealt with.

Cheryl P. said...

Multiple 24-hour cable "news" stations with insatiable appetites. They'll throw any crap on the air these day


Totally agree. It seems that news agencies are so anxious to air the most dramatic headlines first...and to that end they may or may not be accurate or complete.


This particular story has pages and pages on the Internet and most only are saying that the suspension is a direct result of the imaginary grenade. I actually doubt that is the whole story but that's what is being thrown across the headlines.

Cheryl P. said...

Rubbish...I love that use in connection to PC. I guess that's not very PC of me. Probably if we all lived in bubbles we would still find a way to piss each other off.

Trina said...

It is hard to know who is telling the truth anymore. No one backs the schools decisions and supports the teachers- I for one doubt they suspended him for an imaginary grenade, more likely he was throwing rocks. We all are supposed to support the schools to make correct decisions, but are lightening fast to condemn them without really weighing out the situation. The news is to blame too, you'd have thought they did a better job looking at all the facts.
Great thoughts!
Clicks!
--Trina

Wolfbernz said...

Hi Cheryl,
Yes, what an odd story. It sucks that the media jumps all over things like this without really figuring out the issue. How many parents and people thought ill of that school because of this incident? I can't understand a school that might suspend for a fake grenade, but more for repeated misbehavior, but why would the mother lie about that?
We all jump to conclusions, just because mom is a repeat offender does that make the school credible?

The sad part is now that the story has been twisted a hundred ways from Sunday, the child has no concept of what he did that was wrong.

Clicks for you!
Wolf

Jo-Anne said...

What the hell is the world and schools coming to if this story is true and the child was suspended for an imaginary weapon then they have really over reacted...........it seems hard to believe but then here in Aus there have been just as silly reactions to harmless things...............sometimes I wonder what the hell is there a shortage of news events that they have to make stuff up and other times I think if this is true and the school are acting all ott then the parents of those kids affected need to go to the media to get the school to have a rethink...............Sometimes I wonder how they would react to Little Leo who at times when he is mad will say things like I am going to kill you or stab you...............

Cheryl P. said...

That's the crux of the problem, there is such a rush to publish stories but what is the truth. The mother is the one that brought it to the media, who in turn ran with it (at least that is what it appears). I do think the school district needs to clarify their stance in relationship to the Absolutes. There is a lot that isn't being made clear with this particular incident but given it is dealing with a minor, that has to be the case.

Cheryl P. said...

I think you have summed it up very concisely. The story is so twisted at this point everyone has jumped to their own conclusion. With this much.... she said, he said, they said... the real story is fairly contorted. The school will have to clarify their discipline policies to assure the parents that they didn't overreact to innocent play. If the mother is fabricating the events, that, too will surely present itself.


That is one of my points as well. If there are these very stringent policies in play now such as this one or the post I did last week about the boy being charged with a misdemeanor for carrying a toy gun, then we better start educating the children about what is allowed and not allowed....but with that, not get over zealous in how they are reprimanded.

Cheryl P. said...

These types of news stories are appearing more often here as well. When I researched this story several other very similar stories came up. I think that there is a problem of "things being blown out of proportion". I understand that schools can't take any of this lightly but there has to be a level of common sense infused in each situation.

oldereyes said...

I think the appropriate punishment for imaginary weapons is an imaginary suspension. I tend to agree that creating rules against imagining things tends to stifle imagination ... and it's awfully close to having rules against certain thoughts. I also wonder if not allowing play fighting increases the chances of real aggression. It has been shown that violent video games may decrease violent behavior by giving aggressive people an outlet for their aggression.


Click,
Bud

Cheryl P. said...

Hahahha.. ...Imaginary suspension. Yes, no matter what the real story is for this particular case, I think the list of rules that limits imaginary play and imaginary weapons leaves a really gray area for disciplinary action. Let's hope that what goes on in our imagination never makes it's way into the federal or state judiciary system. If it does I hope you will communicate with me during my prison stay.

abeerfortheshower said...

I'm looking forward to the day I have a son, send him to school, and he gets arrested for pointing his index finger at someone and going "pew pew pew." Everybody watch out! Future terrorist on the loose!!

Cheryl P. said...

As creative and clever as you are, it might be an interesting exchange between you the schools personnel. I can only remember two times I went to have a discussion of a "I am not happy" nature with my kid's schools. I was neither clever nor witty. I believe the teachers involved might have uttered the word bitch.



On that note...I am sure your future children will be perfect and never require you having the "less than happy" talk with their schools. Hope for that as it would make your life easier.

Bodaciousboomer said...

One of the few good things about being ancient is that I no longer have these kinds of dilemmas to deal with. Happy VD Miss Cheryl.

Cheryl P. said...

Whoa!!! my friend...you are far from ancient. I would say you and I are not out of our "use before date"...ripe but not spoiled.



But...yes...I, too, am glad not to be fighting these kinds of fights. God forbid, if I had to go in to discuss my kid's imagination. Seriously...Houston wouldn't be far enough away not to feel the reverberations.



BTW...have you already had your surgery??? How are you doing???

meleahrebeccah said...

Um… wow.

How sad we are living in a time when little kids can't even use their imaginations without insane repercussions.

I used to pretend to blow up / shoot my brother ALL THE TIME.

Cheryl P. said...

I just have to think there is something more going on there that isn't being made public. If the school really is enforcing the Absolutes...that's crazy. Something tells me there are some details that the media didn't pass along...perhaps because the school is having to not release student info.

meleahrebeccah said...

Oh, there definitely has to be MORE to this story. Because, really? Getting suspended for using your imagination is beyond excessive punishment.