Friday, October 25, 2013

Lessons Learned

We All Know About the Hazards of Smoking

A 45 year old man from Trinity, TX didn't get the memo about how dangerous smoking can be.  Oh, maybe he wasn't overly concerned about long term damage to his lungs but he should of considered the hazards in smoking while pumping gas.

James Lee Taylor had a bad start to his Tuesday, when he stopped to fill up at a Valero gas station in Trinity.  After running into station to buy a pack of cigarettes, James began to attempt to put $5.00 worth of gas into his Mustang.  Things quickly took a bad turn when he lit up a cigarette.

The gasoline fumes ignited quickly burning off his facial hair including his eyebrows, melted his cigarette lighter, caught the gas pump on fire, ignited  his flip-flops, and charred the side of his car.

A fast thinking Valero employee came out with a fire extinguisher while another turned off the gas supply to the pump.  After police arrived, thanks to someone calling 911, it was discovered the James had outstanding
warrants for his arrest.  On top of all of if his day wasn't already in flames, it was discovered that he wasn't carrying any car insurance.

Prior to his incarceration, he told Officer Randy Wheeler that he had always smoked while pumping gas and this was the first time anything like that had happened.  He went on to say he wouldn't smoke while getting gas in the future. 

  Who would of thought that smoking next to a gas pump could possibly lead to trouble? Evidently not James Lee.  

What Better Example?

Jessylyn Domingo probably didn't plan on being  part of the training for a California college that was conducting classes in emergency preparedness.  According to administrators for West Hills College Lemoor in Fresno, CA that is most certainly what she did, though.

While the students were preparing for the next drill, they heard that someone was outside the building  having
Seems we've arrived early
a baby.  Don Warkentin, President of WHCL  told the press that the other students thought it was  part of the training.

It soon became apparent to staff and students alike that Jessylyn was actually having a baby on a bench on the college grounds. 

Domingo said she was assisted by a man on his way to the training. The man was Charles Freeman, a registered nurse and district director of health care. He had been  alerted to the situation by Leo Orange, a learning skills program assistant. The men helped Domingo deliver her baby and wait for an ambulance.

"I was really impressed with the mother," said Freeman. "She was really calm and had a sense of humor."

Baby Landen Alexander weighed 7 pounds, 14 ounces and was 21 inches long at birth.

What are the odds of having your baby while an emergency preparedness class is going on? She really knows how to bring "show and tell" to a class.

Thou Shall Not Steal

Stealing from the office fridge has always been met with disdain but rarely are the police called. A Pennsylvania man  didn't get the memo, evidently that office refrigerator theft doesn't warrant a 911 situation.

An unidentified man called the police in Upper Macungie, PA  on October 10th,  to report that his Strawberry-flavored Jell-O snack was stolen from the break room refrigerator at his workplace.

The gelatin heist occurred at the Wakefern Food Corporation warehouse in Beinigsville, according to the Upper Macungie Township Police Department.

The 39-year-old victim told cops that theft from the shared refrigerator was an ongoing problem, though it is unclear whether comestibles other than Jell-O have previously been boosted.

The Jell-O theft, which was discovered around 11:30 PM by the victim, is an “open investigation,” a police spokesperson told TSG. While cops do not rule out the possibility of a future arrest, it seems unlikely.

I wish they would of released the 911 tape on this.  Which is the bigger tool...the guy that had the police come out for a snack sized jello theft or the guy taking food out of the fridge? 

 She Is Someone's Favorite Teacher

University of Iowa officials are investigating a teaching assistant who inadvertently emailed nude pictures to students instead of homework answers.

Tom Moore, a spokesman for the school, said the math department TA attached the nude pictures to an email sent to 28 pre-calculus students instead of the solutions to some math problems, the Iowa City Press-
Citizen reported Thursday.

Moore said he could not speculate on any consequences that could result from the investigation.

"Ultimately, as a student, any discipline [if it occurs] would be non-public under [the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act]," he said.

Some students sympathized with the TA, whose name has not been released.

Now there is a TA that really knows how to rock the T&A. She probably taught the whole class a valuable lesson.  Look at your message before hitting the SEND button.


Chubby Chatterbox said...

That woman couldn't have picked a better spot to have her baby...unless of course she was at a hospital.

Agent 54 said...

I've been to Breinigsville, Pa Nice place for cows.

Cheryl P. said...

Yeah, what are the odds of being right next to an emergency preparedness class? I found it funny that one of the guys mentioned that she had a great sense of humor. I don't recall being overly funny while I was giving birth and I wasn't on a public bench in front of strangers.

Cheryl P. said...

And jello stealers...oh and people that like to dial 911.

Wendy said...

Smoking while gassing up? And never had an issue before? Is this guy for real? Although perhaps he was always already smoking, cigarette already on lips, not lighting one up. This must be a two+ pack of day guy if he can't wait to light up because gosh, how long does it take today to put in $5 worth of gas- 30 seconds?
It was her first baby? And she knew how to have a sense of humour? I would love to meet this woman. I almost had one of my lads in a car on the way to the hospital, and believe me, I wasn't joking around when we hit the hospital!
I am still trying to understand why people a) have nude pictures of themselves on their computer ready to email, and b) email them to Anyone. Can someone explain this? Seriously , my sceptical mind in full play as i don't see how this was an accident. One is a document, the other is a photo, they aren't even stored in the same place in the computer. One wonders if she was trying to dispel the myth that math nerds are typically boring ;)

ChickenConsigliere said...

The fridge list made me happy. People are so funny. The TA story. Yikes. I could see how that could happen assuming one would mix their personal photos and their work documents but why why why would one do that? I don't quite get the idea of nude selfies, but I think that's because I'm too old.

lisleman said...

gas pump - what gasoline is flammable? who knew?

That baby will have a story to tell for the rest of his life. On a bench - oh that doesn't sound comfortable.

A slippery jiggly jello thief will hard to catch. I heard about this one and thought of post about it myself.

I have always loved math and the curves some of those functions trace out on a graph can be down right sexy. I remember learning techniques to find the poles of a function ( )
Maybe she confused that with pole dancing.

Nicky said...

You know, if I were a cop, I think I would arrest the dweeb who called to report a Jello theft. Jello. Talk about petty larceny!

Cheryl P. said...

Wendy, it's just getting down-right scary, how much you and I think alike. Should we be checking out our parentage, so see if maybe we are long lost sisters? Perhaps identical twins?

Yeah, if he had been lighting up at the pump his entire driving life, he had been lucky to not already have been incinerated. The fact he has been smoking non-stop for all those years (evidenced by the fact he can't go 30 seconds without a smoke) and he hasn't succumbed to lung cancer is yet another miracle. I guess idiots have guardian angels as well.

I thought the same thing about the new mom. I can't think of any circumstance where I would be jovial during contractions even in the best environment but having total strangers that may or may not be qualified looking at my hoo-ha on a bench...outside...with college kids around...NO WAY would I be amusing. (close call on your baby, huh? I was the type that took three days then had to have a C section)

I think I did a post at one point about how mystified I am that women say "I accidentally sending nude pictures or videos." One ex-Disney star sent out nude pictures on two separate occasions and said it was accidental both times. If they are techy enough to figure out how to load smut onto their computers how are they so stupid as not know how to keep from attaching them to emails and messages? As for the math TA, I thought the very same thought...there is one math teacher that isn't a boring geek. I bet there were less kids cutting class after her nudey pics came out. Parents really should be thanking her for getting their kids to class.

Cheryl P. said...

I thought that was funny as well, Chicken. There is an entire book of these types of notes called " I Lick My Cheese". Jello victim should get a copy.

I find those stories where women claim accidental launching of "nekked" pics pretty interesting. If they really are that stupid that they can't separate their files, they really should not use a computer. BUT then why do they need naked photos. I don't get that, either, I don't think this has to do with you being old...I think this has to do with you being wise.

Wendy said...

Great line on the math story!

Wendy said...

Oh Cheryl, what a naughty last line suggestion! Please, don't let this go viral or ALL the math TA's will consider sending their nude pictures. Of course, most of them are male, both TA and students. I can say this as I am a Math nerd myself, who has tutored Math, but not EVER in the nude!;0

Cheryl P. said...

Evidently not the "now hairless" James Taylor. Gotta wonder when he's out of jail, what his new limitations are as to where he lights up?

What? Your wife didn't have your offspring on benches in front of college kids? As I recall, I wasn't all that comfortable even in a nice hospital bed.

The jello theft was unusual in the sheer level of "who would give a sh**?" category. I find humor at the depths of some people's idiocy. God forbid, that this guy ever has a real emergency, like someone stealing his pastrami on rye.

You might have a point about the confused TA. Pole dancing probably has some geometry involved. As you point out...definitely some curves,

Cheryl P. said...

You are the clever one. I have always said I should send my stuff over for consultation. What do you charge? Petty works for that story.

lisleman said...

Now that's an interesting way to learn geometry. You know if the Greeks had pole dancing we might of had more women mathematicians.

Pickleope said...

I used to work at a gas station and I can, without a shadow of a doubt, assure you, I would NOT run out to the open flames near the gas pump and rather, tender my resignation and run as far away as fast as possible.
On the other hand, I can not, with full confidence, assure you and all parents that if I were a teacher, I wouldn't one day get a little tipsy and mix up my email attachments. Please don't let me be a teacher.

Cheryl P. said...

While I have never worked in a gas station, I am the kind of person that would be covering my own ass...therefore...I am the person that would be seen running away from the station going in the direction opposite the pump. I may not be the brave type but I am the alive type. that could be the explanation....the teacher was drunk. Makes sense. The good news about this story was these were college aged kids and whatever was in that email, they have seen...and done...and could possibly "one up" it. You just know that TA improved the attendance rate for that class. One could say she did a favor to the parents by getting their kiddos to class.

Cheryl P. said...

Lisleman, Lisleman...if the Greeks used strippers to teach math, there would be more MEN mathematicians but there would be more women that have places to strip.

Cheryl P. said...

By keeping your clothes on, Wendy, you missed a big opportunity to get your name in the news. Of course, there might of been a time this would of been scandalous. The articles all said that the TA might not be was an accident, after all. I don't know what she would of had to do to get reprimanded but it may or may not require clothing.

lisleman said...

LOL - tenured strippers - wow you should write for SNL with ideas like that.

Robyn Engel said...

1) Seems smoking kills brain cells too.
2) I hope Charles Freeman got an automatic "pass" for the training. He probably has to take it again, though. What a good guy!

3) I'd like someone to steal my love handles!

Have a great week, Cheryl.

Jo-Anne said...

Smoking while pumping petrol use to be common place back in the days when people really didn't think anything bad would happen, now days there are big no smoking signs all over the place so you really must be thick to do it. Calling the cops over stolen jello is just so stupid I am at a lost for words, I cannot imagine the cops turning up over jello or as we would say jelly.............some people are just so petty.........

Cheryl P. said...

1) In James Taylor's case...sounds like the few brain cells left might need life support.

2) Let's assume he passed the class and got a lot of "high fives" and "thumbs up" from the onlookers. (probably no shaking his hand until he had a chance to wash)
3) Better that than your virginity

Cheryl P. said...

Yeah, you really have to question someone's IQ that would light up next to a gas pump. Thick is a good word.
Wonder if the cops came just to meet the idiot that called the 911 line over a snack size Jello. Must of been a slow night at the police station.

ChickenConsigliere said...

If not wise, at least not that stupid and narcissistic:-)

abeerfortheshower said...

As a Mustang guy, my first thought was "No! Why that poor car?" Then I see in the picture it's a '94-98 body style, V6 (you can tell by the rims), and probably isn't even worth $1,000. So... never mind. Also, we accidentally e-mail each other pornographic pictures when we really mean to attach the next part of our novel all the time. It's just so easy to mix up!

Dexter Klemperer said...

Love the informal poll on the fridge. And I used to think geometry was boring. I bet applications to the University of Iowa are up. And how many naked pictures do you have to have on a phone before you nonchalantly forget about them?

Cheryl P. said...

Aren't you a car-knowledge smarty pants. (Gosh, I need to draw a new cartoon character named Smarty Pants....or better yet I will use your cartoon)
I guess the cheap mustang is all he can afford because the cost of his 5 pack a day (or whatever it is) habit keeps him tapped out.
Oh sure, I can see where accidents happen. Perhaps you and the TA should have one computer designated as your porn computer. There probably is a good sorting method for dirty pics to keep them all straight. I will be giving that some thought. I might come up with some new innovative way to isolate files for you. I will call it the Smut Sorter.

Cheryl P. said...

Gauging from all the assorted stories we keep hearing related to schools, I don't think things work like they used to work. I thought the same thing. I bet attendence is up at least in the math department. The Univeristy would be stupid to fire her.
God, the very thought of having pictures on my computer sans layers and layers of clothing makes me ill. At my is my friend. So there isn't a worry...not one...about any nude pictures going astray.

AletaObrien said...

It amazes me that people smoke at the gas pump…. and I've seen it a number of times. Scares me just to see it!

One of my ex's came to mind when I read the police call about the stolen fridge food at the office. Yep, I wouldn't put it past one of my ex's to do something ridiculous like that, thinking, "THIS will teach them to steal from me." What an idiot!

Cheryl P. said...

You know, I have seen that as well. Another thing I see a lot...really a lot, is people flicking ashes and cigarette butts out of car windows. Don't people worry that something could ignite? It seems to me there are just so many things that could be flammable.

Haha, I am pretty sure you are sighing a sigh of relief that your ex is an EX. Especially since you ended up with such a great guy. I can't imagine someone getting that upset over snack food. Seems that would indicate a pretty short fuse.