Sunday, July 3, 2011

I Have a Few Questions

I am a question asker or maybe I am more of a question thinker. On any given day, I think of  a few... more than a few...OK a  lot of questions, to which I would love to know the answers.  Mind you I don't always ask them aloud  or pose these questions to other people but still I question a  LOT of things. 

This has not always been the case.  There were times that I should have asked questions and didn't.  I got off to a rather shaky start  regarding  WHEN and WHEN NOT to acquire further information before moving forward.

When I started first grade, I was a nervous and timid.  These  traits would stay with me  for quite awhile  but the worst day was the FIRST day. (our school district didn't have kindergarten back then, so this was the first time I had been in a school)

After we all got seated  at our desks, Mrs. Wolfe passed out some paper and told us to get out our crayons.  I noticed the girl next to me started drawing a picture on her paper.  That seemed like a good idea at the time. So I start a little picture of my own.  When Mrs. Wolfe noticed "girl next to me" was drawing she had her come up to the front of the classroom scolded her and gave her a swat with a paddle.  (this was pretty standard fare in the late 1950's)

I had never been so frightened in my life (well...up to that point, I have topped that level of  being scared many times over since then).  I am expecting to be spanked in front of the class on the very first day of first grade. Of course, I had to get caught first.  I was shy but not necessarily stupid, so I had already flipped my paper over and now was waiting for further instructions.  By lunch time I was a mess.  As I sat crying in the cafeteria and proceeded to throw up my lunch. Someone from the school sent for my mother to retrieve me.

 I did, by the way avoid getting paddled for several reasons. (1) The other girl was repeating the 1st grade and had a history of being "a problem" so she had that going against her. I am not saying that was right, I am stating that it was a rare day when she wasn't in trouble over something or another.  (2)  Being really small for my age, I  looked like a baby  and seemingly acted like one too.  I was sent home at lunch time every day  for the first couple of weeks but hardly ever did I leave prior to crying and throwing up. (3) Mrs. Wolfe truly was a wonderful teacher and was patient with me.  I could read and write really well at that point and my missing some afternoons didn't seem to shake her up much.  Maybe she knew that I would be the subject of conversation for years to come and had pity on me.  My vomiting stories still are a  hot topic in the "remember when" category when I see my old classmates.  It must have left a lasting  impression as that was 51 years ago. 

Back to the premise...I should have asked the question...what next?  What are we doing here with this paper? 

 Over the years I have developed the tendency to be cautious  and make sure I have all the information I need before preceding.  This comes with some dos and don'ts, however.  There is definitely a protocol to asking the appropriate questions and the number of allotted questions before the people around you start begging for your head on a platter. This protocol is commonly referred to as O' QUAP. (official question asking protocol.)  I respect and adhere to O'QUAP as much as humanly possible.

For example:  Continuing education classes.   There is always that person that turns a 3 hour class into a 4 hour class because of their incessant questions.  Not only do they ask "not-stop" questions but they are STUPID, DUMB ASS questions.  Whoever said there are no stupid questions is NUTS.  Of course, there are stupid questions and there are stupid question askers.  These, by the way, are referred to in "question asking circles"  as SO QUAPPY (Stupid Obtuse Question-Asking People Perpetually Yammering)

As a Realtor, we take a lot of classes about ethics.  I suspect as Realtors we need a lot of classes on ethics as it seems a lot of the group still doesn't understand the concept.  In these classes we go over and over the fact if a real estate agent knows of a material defect with a property or something that can adversely affect the value of a property we need to disclose that to a potential buyer.  What each state considers "material defects" differs greatly but frankly if you want to CYA you really should be disclosing what you know.

 Invariably the instructor will be talking  ad nauseam about disclosing defects when someone will ask 

 Annoying Person "Do we need to disclose if the basement has flooded?"

Instructor "If you know this to be a fact, yes you do."

AP..."Do we need to disclose a leaking roof."

Instructor  "Yes"

AP "How about a murder?"

Instructor  "That's not really a material defect but yes if you know it, disclose it."

AP... " How about termites, about wood about about about the sinking about recalled about the Walmart slated to be built next about the pedophile that lives next about the lead paint, how about crack in the basement floor, how about the previous owners meth lab, how about train track behind the fence..... on and on and on

I might mentioned that nine times out of ten, the person that keeps asking these questions has been a real estate agent for 15, 20, 25 years or some such thing.  The brand new agents think they have all the answers.

So...while I do ask questions, I try to NOT ask so many questions that it annoys the people around me.  Therefore, my plan is now to ask my blog readers to sporadically answer some of my questions.   On some days instead of the Good, the Bad and the Weird, I am going to throw out some of the things that puzzle me. 

Such are a few questions on my mind today...

Why do the guys that spend the money to buy Corvettes drive 30 miles an hour in a 45 mile speed limit zone when they are in a residential area?  This isn't just once in a while.   This is chronic.   They have spent big money to buy a bright yellow car that is capable of going 60 miles an hour in 3.4 seconds but drive substantially under the speed limit in town.  WHY?

Conversely, why do the drivers of these powerful performance cars drive 85+ miles an hour in a 65 mile an hour zone on the Interstate?  Isn't he just asking for a ticket?  I mean he is in a canary yellow car? OR bright red OR metallic blue..whatever... aren't they "rolling the dice"  with both their insurance rates and the State Cop that is waiting  to nab them? Why do they still have a valid driver's license?

Why do all the schools have those signs that say this is a drug free zone?  If they are referring to illegal drugs, all the streets are drug free zones. If they are talking over the counter drugs and you have taken your Zantac or Sudafed, do you need to take a different route?

Why do people buy some piece of trash disguised as marketing genius off of an infomercial and then act shocked that it is a piece of crap?  THEN they throw out the "the man said it would do this and this without you having to ever do that and that".   Really, when you are buying something that is supposed to be miraculous for the low price of "not one but ...wait...two for $19.95", why are people surprised that it is garbage.

NOTE:  As a salesperson, let me point out something while we are here anyway....salespeople are trying to SELL you something.  It is their job to slant things creatively to get you to BUY what they are selling.  This is true of any product, service or political agenda. 

Why do people at funerals go on and on about how wonderful and/or beautiful  the deceased looks?  I have been to a lot of funerals and I will even admit that some morticians do  remarkable work.  Still the deceased is not looking their very best.  Never have I thought the guest of honor looked the best they have ever looked.

My friends, have you any answers to these questions?  I have plenty more to ask and I don't want to impose BUT I would welcome your insight to these little mysteries.

I would also, welcome your questions?  What troubles you? 

This video isn't really about questions but it was one of the things I listened to on my afternoons at home.  It was a big hit in 1958. 


Nicky said...

Ok, here's my take on your questions:

- They drive that slow so everybody can see their hawt car and know that they are rich, cool and have a small penis.

- They drive that fast so everybody can see their hawt car is powerful, meaning they must be powerful too even though they have a small penis.

- The drug free school zone signs are so that schools can absolve themselves of responsibility when drugs are shockingly discovered in school. "Drugs?! Here?! But we PUT UP A SIGN!!"

- People buy cheap crap and expect it not to be crap because there are a lot of lazy people who don't actually want to do "that and that" to get results. They want to buy results for $19.95. They get what they pay for.

- "The deceseased looks wonderful" is because people want to believe that the dead person is happy being dead. Makes it easier to get over the person's death. Unless that person was really, really rich and didn't leave them anything in their will. Usually, it takes a great deal of alcohol to get over that.

There you have it. Now, what I really want to know is: as a realtor, do you have to disclose a murder if you were the one to commit the murder? :-)

Cheryl P. said...

Nicky, you just crack me up!!! If I pee myself, it is all your fault and I am going to send you a dry cleaning bill. Be watching for it.

Of course now I have more questions...What good is a hawt car if the guy has a tiny penis? He could pick up the chick but not have the equipment to do anything other than drive her around.

Because I have alcohol intolerance and can't drink a drop...does that mean I get to just say "this dead as**** looks like sh** when they don't leave me some of their moolah?

I think you might have discovered a loop hole in the whole disclosure thing pertaining to murder. Probably the whole "self imcrimination" thing trumps the state's real estate ethics laws. Actually most things tend to trump real estate ethics laws.

Annie (Lady M) x said...

Crikey, there are so many dilemmas, that I don't know where to start. Umm .... maybe the guy in the yellow Corvette is driving slowly so that people can properly see him.

Admiring dead people is probably a nervous response .... with the observer desperately trying to find something positive to say.

My question would be: "why do you have to dry-clean raincoats?"

Cheryl P. said...

I think you are right on both of those. The guy in the vet is always an older man that is trying to regain his youth and thinks he is lookin' good.

The people at the funeral are trying to say something nice.

I too, have thought about the rain coat cleaning issue. My take on it is the manufacturer is trying to have it not washed by amateurs that might shrink it with hot water or tumble the hell out of it in the dryer where the seams would likely not hold up long term. Nothing to do with the waterproof fabric but more to do with how the coat was fabricated.

Kimberly Wyatt said...

Just found your blog after reading a comment on Absolutely Narcissism and I'm definitely a new follower. I'm the same way with questions. The Corvette thing must be a nation-wide problem, because it's prevalent in KY, too. And I'm pretty excited you posted the Witch Doctor video. Haha.

Cheryl P. said...

Hi Kimberly, Thank you for stopping by and esp. for following. I went over to your place as I always like to reciprocate. What a cute family you have! Wowzer what a good lookin' bunch you guys are.

I love your photography and your flowers. I, too garden and do a fair job, but my photography skills are nearly nonexistant.

I am glad to know that I am not the only one to ask lots of questions.

The Witch Doctor song gets in your head doesn't it? See...there goes another question. I just can't help myself.

L.C. Griffith said...

Happy Independence Day Cheryl! I love the questions! I can just see you sitting in the classroom squirming...makes me want to go back in time and console you.
Here's some of my own questions to the universe:
Why do I go slack jawed, letting my mouth hang open like the hinge is broken, when I’m writing?
Why is my favorite color of lipstick always discontinued?
Why do Mondays last longer than Fridays?
Keep the great posts coming girl!

Madge said...

Nicky you took all my answers! Damn Canadians!

Cheryl P. said...

That is interesting about the jaw dropping...I guess I wouldn't second guess things that work. Perhaps that is the missing part to why my writing is a grade A product and yours is.

That lipstick thing is a conspiracy. All makeup colors get discontinued the minute they get popular so we are forced to buy 3 or 4 different products in search for a replacement. BUT as soon as you find the new perfect color it will be discontinued.

I hadn't noticed the Monday vs Friday time flux but I have noticed vacation days run twice the speed of work days.

Cheryl P. said...

That Nicky is quick isn't she. She has even figured out the loop hole as to how a real estate agent wouldn't have to disclose a murder. Shrewd, very shrewd.

Jayne said...

Nicky nailed it. The Corvette thing -- it's all about penis size. Sadly, men have still not figured out the true image they're projecting. As for the deceased "looking wonderful," yeah -- for a corpse! I don't get the "drug free school zone" thing at all. Again, I agree with Nicky. Way to cover their bureaucratic butts.

Cheryl P. said...

I had a new thought on this after watching some guy on the Marriage Ref going thru his midlife crisis. Part of it is trying to capture their youth and now they have the money to buy the toys they didn't have when they were actually young. Probably some women going thru this same crisis of wanting to recapture their youth would be getting face lifts and boob jobs. Just a thought. I am thinking that I won't be getting a fancy car or new boobs.

Jayne said...

You make a good point. I wouldn't mind having my 1967 Triumph Spitfire back.

Junebug said...

First of all, don't get me started on unethical realtors and (when I bought in KS) the fact any Joe Blow can hang a shingle to be an "inspector". Our basement leaked like a sieve!!! Not given to us as prior knowledge. Horrific experience. We may have lost money on the resale but I was very upfront about our basement on the resale and even provided the quotes for the fixes. I did not want the new buyer to feel like we did. I was worried about it selling but it was not a problem. Honesty is always best. I'm better now.

People drive fast because they are idiots. Every couple weeks a person is getting killed by idiot drivers in Savannah. Tourists + idiot fast drivers = death.

Wow - my comments today are not so positive. Sorry! In a bit of a mood but your video helped cheer me up.

As for the drugs, even if they wanted me to drive around around the school zone, my Valium keeps me from giving a damn.

Cheryl P. said...

That does sound fun. Wouldn't that make you feel good to have a fun do over like that.

Cheryl P. said...

Yes, there are a lot of salespeople out there that will say anything to close the sale. The leaking basements are not uncommon in terms of not disclosing. Now in KS they have a new law that if an inspector fails to disclose something there is a $10,000 fine.

Cheryl P. said...

Sorry, it cut me off... Hope everything is ok today. No bad moods allowed. I actually got pissy this morning over something, that Valium might have come in handy. With my luck I would have some horrible reaction so I guess I just will stay crabby.

Try to have a good day.