Thursday, February 23, 2012

Idiots, Idioms, and Incidents

As I was checking my sources for the lesser reported news stories for the week, I happened to notice a lot of the headlines were similar to well known idioms.  Go figure....idioms in the news.  (Please note: I said idioms not idiots, although, to be fair,  there did seem to be some overlap.)

For any of you that might have slept through  English class the day  idioms  were discussed, let me refresh your memory.....


id·i·om/ˈidēəm/

Noun:
  1. A group of words established by usage as having a meaning not deducible from those of the individual words (e.g., raining cats and dogs).
  2. A form of expression natural to a language, person, or group of people: "he had a feeling for phrase and idiom".


Serious as a Heart Attack


A menu for those that like to live on the edge.
 As idioms go, this one is rather straight forward. It means the person is "very serious".  Here is an example:




















shoot yourself in the foot

Meaning: If you shoot yourself in the foot, you harm yourself in some way by doing something stupid or making a silly mistake.
For example:
The Minister of Agriculture shot himself in the foot by saying that farmers couldn't understand economics because they weren't educated. He resigned soon after.

For a real life example: A Brazilian bank robber took the idiom to heart.  Upon guarding the door while his buddies stole $16,000 from a bank, the bungling burglar shot himself. Yes, he did...in the foot.  He was arrested later after seeking medical treatment at a local hospital.





You have to admit...as examples go...this is a good one.


Keep Your Chin Up 

or

Over the Top

  There are a number of idioms that could fit this story,  if one wants to use their imagination a bit. Actually, some of these idioms  fit the story both figuratively and literally.


Sheyla is going to be discussing her need for larger breasts
on TLC this coming Sunday. She doesn't appear to be a big fan of
the idiom "less is more". 
 Sheyla Hershey currently holds the record in the Guinness Book of World Records for having the "World's Largest Enhanced Breasts" at a whopping 38KKK.  She has gone back to her doctor to try to have them enhanced to MMMs. (which I can only assume stands for Monumentally Massive Mammories) She had tried last year but due to a staph infection had to have the implants removed.  She is going to try again.

hhhMMMM...how about the idioms "last but not least, or "in your face".  Really, the possibilities are endless.

Let Sleeping Dogs Lie*

(*disclosure this dog is really, really sleeping)

A man in Sarnia, Ont. was sorting through the mail and found a pre-approved credit card offer for his dog Spark.   Spark Sloan, the sheltie-spaniel mix was eligible to sign up online for a credit limit of $30,000 with Capital One.

The problem with the offer was two fold.

#1- It was addressed to Spark, a DOG.
#2 - Spark died 10 years ago.


Kelly Sloan, Spark's former owner,  was quoted as saying  "It’s a heck of a deal. She can apply online today, and I guess, get her card. With the economy the way it is, I can understand they’re becoming a little more lenient than they were as far as passing out credit cards.” The family went on to say that if Spark had been able to get her paws on a credit card, she would have loved a  blue hula hoop.

Capital One apologized for the error and said that before an
actual card is issued there is an application process that is subject to  approval.

The credit card company stated that the  applicant would have had to jump through some additional hoops before receiving a credit line.   Well, put Capital One.  Let's imagine it would be blue.

20 comments:

Thechubbychatterbox said...

It's so easy to take some of these idioms for granted. They seem strange when pointed out. Very interesting.

Wayne said...

38KKK, can't seem to

"wrap my brain around that"

Cheryl P. said...

Hi Chatterbox, As our world is just chock full of these little phrases, I wasn't too surprised when I spotted the "shot himself in the foot" as an actual headline but then to see the "serious as a heart atttack...just couldn't believe that nearly every news story can be attached to a cliche.

Cheryl P. said...

Not to diminish the amount of brain matter you posess but dear god, you would have to have a LOT of brain to wrap around those babies. And that is before they become MMM.

BobS said...

You know, I am not even going to comment on any of this. Everything that comes to mind just doesn't sound good in print. Some of it is due, in part, that I am laughing so much that I cannot think straight. I just love it all.

One thought does come to mind with people and plastic surgery. Once they start they just cannot seem to stop. Michael Jackson was a prime example. He went from a good looking guy to a freak. Just a shame.

Thanks again for a great post.

Cheryl P. said...

You had me worried for a minute there, Bob. Usually when people start with "I'm not even going to comment...it's followed by "What kind of a freakin' moron are you, Cheryl???? Of course, then I have to defend myself as a pretty middle of the road, moron.

You are right about the plastic surgeries that are part of some addictive behavior. That is what the TLC show on Sunday is about. Strange Addictions. I don't understand how people can't see the oddity they become with too much work being done.

Bodaciousboomer said...

Did you see the same woman in the news recently that claimed that her ginormous breast implants saved her life when she was in a wreck?
http://www.myfoxhouston.com/dpp/news/local/120209-woman-says-breast-implants-saved-her-life

Cheryl P. said...

yeah, I saw that one and another one where a lady said her boobs saved her from a bullet. Evidently, these women bought SUPERBOOBS.

Nonamedufus said...

"Dumb as a post" might be a good idiom to describe the people in each of these stories. But, hey, without them what would we have to laugh at.

BobS said...

I'm glad I clarified myself. It is all just very humorous. I have read enough of your posts to know the spirit in which you deliver your material. All of it is great.

Cheryl P. said...

Thank you, Bob. I always love to get comments from you. Even if and when we disagree on whats funny, I know we will still be blog friends.

Cheryl P. said...

Seems there is no truth in the idiom "bottom of the barrel". The barrel is infinite in it's depth of "stupid is as stupid does". Thanks for stopping by.

Nicky said...

Triple K boobs and she wants them to be BIGGER?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Congratulations, Cheryl. I am speechless.

Cheryl P. said...

OMG, speechless.....really????? Do I get a prize????

meleahrebeccah said...

"when a customer dining on a Triple Bypass Burger appeared to be having a heart attack.  Unsure if the event was a "spoof" fellow diners were initially laughing and taking pictures.  As it turns out, it wasn't a hoax."

I am going to hell - because I think that is friggen hilarious.

And the hell…. who needs Monumentally Massive Mammories like that? Oy vey. Just think of the back problems that come along with that.

PS: I abuse the term IN YOUR FACE all the time. It just never gets old.

Cheryl P. said...

Well, you and I will have eternity in hell to giggle about all the stuff we think is funny. How could that not be.

Now every time you say "in your face" you will be thinking of ginormous MMMs

meleahrebeccah said...

Ahahahahhahahahah! YES!!!!!!

Bodaciousboomer said...

I think I was here the other day, but it could been deja vu.

Steven Bowen said...

Haha! This is brilliant! You write exactly like me too! :D

Cheryl P. said...

Hi Steven, I haven't seen your around here before. Thank you so much for stopping by. I love any comment that has the word brilliant in it. Do you have a blog???