Monday, July 2, 2012

Bored Times a Gazillion

I suspect this might turn into several posts as I am pretty sure most of you aren't up for a manifesto on the subject of what will go down in history as the record breaker of all boring weekends.

If there was a way to quantify boredom, my weekend would be in the next volume of the Guinness Book of World Records.

OK, so all of you are out there saying "If you are so bored, why didn't you just do something?" 

"Do you people not get the very nature of boredom...nothing sounds fun or appealing when you are mind-numbingly bored!"  Even the youngest of children know this when they whine,  "I'm BORED."
Nothing...I repeat...NOTHING..is going to sound fun.


So...let's start with REASONS for my extreme boredom.


A.  Husband is now on his 11th week out of town.  I have made enough trips to Nebraska that I see no advantage of being bored there as compared to here...well short of seeing my sweet husband..but he is there working, after all....and my cell phone and computer hardly work there...so there is that.

B.  It is so witheringly hot...... it has all but sapped the life's blood out of me.  Now...before all of you people that live in places that are routinely hot start judging me for being a whiner...let's just clarify a few points. 

  •   Most of you that live in places that are routinely over 100 degrees in the summer are (more)  prepared for it.  You have zoned air conditioners.  You have grass that is equipped to survive the heat. You get a break in the winter by enjoying beautifully  mild, "never-need-a-parka-and-snow-boots-lucky-us-we-aren't-freezing-our-asses-off" kind of winters.  I, on the other hand,  live in Kansas and we are currently in the middle of a drought.  None of those things I just mentioned above apply to us. It has been over a hundred for a week or so but seems much longer...let's not split hairs here.... with humidity over 70% lets just call it infinitesimally long.  AND there is no end in sight!

  • I will not get a break in the winter.  I will be shoveling 20-40 inches of snow and freezing my ass off so, I really don't appreciate Mother Nature double dipping her extreme weather patterns on the middle part of the U.S. BUT...I will not be sending another letter to Mother Nature relaying my concerns, as the previous three caused me a great deal of angst and expense.  For you, my  more recent readers, this is a precautionary warning.  Mother Nature doesn't take kindly to complaint letters.  (for a review you can click back to read  my two latest letters Were You Not Listening and Now That's Just Playing Dirty)

C.   If the heat wasn't enough to keep me home, the crowds of people and traffic that have resulted from the free Blake Shelton concert on the mall parking lot and the casting call for America's Biggest Loser being in town has my desire to fight the the crowds at  about 0%.


Now in my attempt to keep busy on a ...did I mention the 105 degree temperature?...hot day without my husband to hang around with and my kids at the lake...here are just a couple of the things I have done.

  • Cleaned an already clean house
  • Load some new fonts onto my computer, that you will never get to see as Blogger let's me choose from about 7 or something.
  • Read..Currently reading Let's Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny Lawson
  • Watch TV ....one notable show that I will talk about in a different post
  • Work on my garden in an effort to resuscitate it. It's currently in ICU and not expected to live.
Oh and there is this...As I was killing an inordinate amount of time just cruising down the Information Highway (old school for Internet, kiddies)...I came upon a new (to me) blog that is going to have a very negative influence on me...at least for wasting time.  An older post on  A Beer for the Shower was talking about cell phone music.  No...not downloading music to a cell phone but PLAYING music on a cell phone.

 Which brings me to a bit of time spent perfecting Happy Birthday on my IPhone keyboard. Seems I came across this info just in time as  most my family members having August birthdays. I need this to be spot-on.

For those of you that aren't already proficient at playing music on your cell  phone keyboards, let me point out to you "non-smart phone users"...you do understand I am saying your phone is non-smart...I am sure you are a genius...,  that your older phone is far superior for playing keyboard music on. This can be your reason for not getting with the current technology aka a smart phone.

In all fairness, maybe Android phones are superior to Apple in the capacity of playing Happy Birthday.  As I have an IPhone, I can  tell you that a couple of notes could be better. The number 9 I think should be a sharp, but I could be wrong. Anyway,  as I was saying, it is really hard to make the music sound right on an Iphone. 

I have every confidence in your musical cell phone ability, no matter what your instrument (cell phone) is. Are we ready ???? Play...

112163 
112196
11# 9632
## 9696

Did that sound like Happy Birthday??? If it didn't...you didn't do it right.

Try..Frere Jacques...you just can't fail on this one...

1231 1231
369 369
9# 9631
9# 9631
191 191

Really, if that doesn't work for you...just load the app Tiny Piano...It's free.

OR if you have an old school phone try this...I know all of you are going to want to dig out a Nokia phone.









I will stop for now, and go water my "soon to be deceased" plants.  I have some other exciting activities to share with you later.



10 comments:

Linda R. said...

We're pretty hot around here, too. I know, the South is supposed to be hot. Some years we have moderate weather, and some years we get outrageous heat/humidity and cold, snowy winters. However the heat is more likely than a lot of snow. I am taking a bit of a writing break after those intense 30 days, to catch up on some of the things I let slide. I hope you get a break from the boredom and try to stay cool! ;)

Cheryl P. said...

I am actually getting a tad worried as our plants aren't used to extended hot and dry but short of throwing a lot of water on them...nothing can be done.I loved gardening in the south (I lived in Dallas) as the plants are like cast iron. They would take anything and keep on growing.
No..I have a busier day today so there is less liklihood of boredom. I meet with a personal trainer every Monday, so she will try to kill me and I will try to not die. Heh, heh.

Chubby Chatterbox said...

At the risk of losing whatever respect you might have been foolish enough to have for me, I'll confess that i might be the only one left in the world who doesn't have a cell phone. And I don't want one. When I'm away from home i don't want to be reached. That and the fact that no one ever calls me. pathetic? Yes.

Cheryl P. said...

My respect for you is intact. I doubt if you are alone in the world but I think it is getting rarer for people not to have one. There is something to be said for not being at people beck and call. Just curious...does Mrs. Chatterbox use a cell phone? I have a good friend that doesn't own a cell phone but his wife does and he occassionally uses it if he is waiting on someone to call him back.

Linda Medrano said...

Cheryl, My husband travels at least 2 weeks out of every month. It's a bummer. If I had the energy, I'd take up tennis, or at least a tennis pro. But I don't so I won't. The only saving grace is that I live in Northern California, right across the bay from San Francisco. It's cool here year round. if it was hot I would die. I'm sort of bored to, so why don't you fly out for a visit. You can get cooled off and I'll be entertained and feed you margaritas at noon. Sound good? Come on out!

Cheryl P. said...

My husband travels most of the the time. That isn't how we planned it when we were young but that is how his job evolved. I keep trying to come up with a "perfect" hobby but so far nothing has inspired me. Tennis is out as I am a total clutz.
I agree that you live in a perfect place as far as the climate goes. Esp. this year with most of the nation sweltering. I would love to come for a visit but there are at least two problems 1. if I left my house my yard would burn up from these horrible temperatures. I am like a firman dousing out the flames at this point. 2. I am no fun...I have a nasty thing called alcohol intolerance. Can't drink alcohol as it makes me sick. I could have vigin margaritas. Are you sure you don't want to come to Kansas City and experience what it would be like to live in a sauna?
I wish I had known about you a year or so ago. My husband was in San Fran for about 10 weeks working and I was there in his corporate condo hanging out for a couple of weeks.

Linda Medrano said...

Cheryl, we don't have to smoke or drink to have a good time. We can always go shoe shopping! (That's even better!) Should you join your husband in SF, let me know! We'll meet up and have a play date!

meleahrebeccah said...

* I've never been married, but I suspect I'd PREFER a traveling hubby. Because my "alone time" is that sacred!

* The heat/humidity make my brain melt. And it totally adds to the when you're already bored, not wanting to do much of anything to get un-bored! I am very thankful for my central air-conditioning.

*I tried the Happy Bday song on my iPhone and it didn't work too well. But, I'm also medicated as I'm sick, AGAIN, so I'm probably doing it wrong.

Cheryl P. said...

I think there is something to be said for some alone time. I like it when his travels are a little shorter in duration but I have gone up to see him a couple of times so it has worked out OK.
Yes, the heat and humidity turn me into a slug. I lose all motivation.
I LOVE that you gave it a try. When you feel better try it again and for the first time you play it, sing along to get your spacing right. Then it will sound exactly right. Frere Jaques nearly always sounds right.
I love having you as a blog friend, you are one of the few that is so willing to go along with nonsense. And the fact you find humor in some of the same shit I do, just makes you the best EVER.
I hope you feel better soon.

meleahrebeccah said...

Awwwwwwwwwww! I love you too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!