Monday, December 3, 2012

Do They NOT Know Me?



Thought Number One: The Other Season that is less HO HO HO and more BANG BANG BANG


It has come to my attention for the umpteenth time that my family members, have not been paying attention to anything I have ever said or done. Why would I think this, you ask? I happened to call my brother a few days ago and he was super excited about the fact that deer hunting season had started. Well...to be perfectly accurate, hunting with a bow has started. The "hunting with a gun" season is yet to start. Poor baby, has another 12 days to wait before he can use bullets. Anyway...as I was saying....I called to see if I could stop by and drop off a  "no particular reason other than you are my only sibling" present for him but NOOOOO....DID I FAIL TO MENTION...IT'S BOW HUNTING/KILLING SEASON????

  It's not exactly (although pretty darn close) that I am anti-hunting. It's more that I am anti-hearing-about-hunting. If anyone had noticed...I am the same person that scoops up spiders and takes them outside. Didn't you all read Charlotte's Web? (NOTE: If they are horribly big with black-widow markings, I make exceptions to my "no kill" policy). For the most part though, I try not to kill living things. Oh, I hear all you hunters out there starting to ramble about over-population, and good forestry practices. Let's all lament about how those hungry deer are eating up the trees and need to be curtailed.  Shush! Just Shush! All of that may be true but when you decide to go after them...please...please...DON'T GIVE ME ANY OF THE DETAILS.

I have my fingers in my ears!!!! Lalalalalalalalla  Lalalalalalalalal





As far as my brother goes, I understand hunting is one of  his "things".  Everyone has a thing.  I actually thought he might get over the love of shooting arrows at defenseless deer because of  last year's hunting incident.  Yes, the incident.  Last year,  he fell out of a deer stand and broke both his feet.  Yeh, both feet.... you would think that would dampen one's enthusiasm a tad.....surgeries....casts...not being able to walk...not being able to drive a car....BUT...no, it appears that nothing dampens the desire to hunt.

click to enlarge

(ANOTHER NOTE:  To all of my readers that know my brother...do not...I repeat...DO NOT...feel the need to tell him that I called him a dumba**.  I didn't. I merely pointed out that he broke both feet.)


Then...if that wasn't enough, my dear (no pun intended) bro went on to tell me that he bagged a doe.
Are you flipping kidding me?  He told me he killed a girl deer..perhaps someone's  mommy-deer.

AND THINGS KEEP GETTING WORSE...

We went out to dinner about an hour after the horror of finding out my brother murdered a mother deer and we go to a place that has this on the wall.



The only thing better than a dead deer watching me eat is a dead deer with a festive holiday hat on.

Before you all assume that I am totally above killing a living thing, I have been known to kill a vegetable or two.

click to enlarge
While I am incapable of putting meat on the table...I must confess...I am a serial killer of vegetables.


Thought Number Two: Another Deer Story

The other night, I was whining over dinner with two of our best friends about my "less than enthusiastic" stance on deer hunting, when he mentioned the video about the deer crossing.  I am sure most of you have heard this but, still...it's pretty funny to think that someone out there doesn't understand what the deer crossing sign means.







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33 comments:

Chubby Chatterbox said...

Fun post and I love the video. I've shown it to several people and everyone just shakes their head in amazement.

meleahrebeccah said...

Um… if I broke BOTH of my feet during an activity, regardless of how much I loved it - you can better your bottom dollar I'd NEVER do it again!

And I am also anti-hearing-about-hunting. And I will WALK OUT of a restaurant that has dead animals hanging on the walls.

My father refuses to kill anything too, and he also takes spiders outside as opposed to squishing them dead.


------

Um… OMFG. I just listened to the video. That lady REALLY BELIEVES those signs are ENCOURAGING the deer to CROSS THE ROAD on that exact spot on the highway? Like, they can READ? I just died. And then when she said, move the signs to school crossings so the deer cross there? I literally gaged on my coffee. I am bedside myself with laugher and also a little horrified that people can be THAT stupid!

Thank you for making my DAY!

Cheryl P. said...

Thanks, Chatterbox. Aren't you constantly amazed at the stupidity of people? Certainly good for a laught though.

Cheryl P. said...

Yeh...absolutely. Took him nearly the whole year to get back on his feet and he can't hardly wait to get bact to hunting. I will never understand the fascination of that sport. Ick...major ick.
I am not surprised about your dad...because I LOVE your family...they are awesome.
Meleah, I think we can agree that some people just have sh** for brains.

meleahrebeccah said...

XOXOXO

Lia said...

I was reading this in my evolutionary biology class (of all places to be while reading a moral take on hunting!) and could NOT STOP LAUGHING! I literally ALMOST peed my pants when I saw the stuffed deer. "The only thing better than a dead deer watching me eat is a dead deer with a festive holiday hat on." That my friend needs to be a bumper sticker!

Even though I got a lot of fun out of this post, I too relate with your take on hunting and eating meat. Though I'm still pretty omnivorous, I have been eating less and less meat as time goes by, and I definitely no longer buy meat in chains (boycotting slaughterhouses) and instead prefer individual farmers selling meat.

It DOES make me sad that you have to suffer your brother's tales of deer hunting! You should do what I do in class, sit there and space out. You won't hear a thing!

Cheryl P. said...

You're evolutionary biology classmates must think you REALLY enjoy biology. Bumper sticker....what a great idea!! I should start designing bumper stickers!!!


That is exactly where I am as far as eating meat. I eat far less than I used to. And I am somewhat fussy about what meat I eat.


I will say though, I am mostly teasing about my brother. He is aware of my sissy ways and he rarely talks much about any hunting exploits. He did tell me about the doe but I think he was just so excited he couldn't NOT tell anyone that was willing to listen. I try not to listen. Perhaps I really should invest is sound great noise-cancelling earphones.

Liggybee said...

Hahaha...that is just too funny! But you know, I have often wondered myself, who those Deer Crossing signs are really meant for, or if deer really frequent those crossing areas. I mean, do wild animals even follow a traffic pattern? Maybe they'll start crossing from down the street...then people will have to move the crossing sign down there. Otherwise, we'd totally be unprepared for them crossing because we would've thought we've reached the "safe zone" after we've passed the sign. Right? Oh well! Those were good thoughts!!! I always enjoy your posts!

Click!

Cheryl P. said...

That is an interesting point. I wonder if people let down their guard after awhile when they are well past those signs. Maybe thinking they are no longer in an area prone to deer.



When my husband was 16 he hit 3 deer that ran in front of him and he is still very cautious in wooded or rural areas. Usually where those signs are, there has been an accident. What those signs should say is, "There are deer in the area and they are intent on running in front of you. Oh, and by the way, driver....they are probably going to total your car." Perhaps that's just too much to put on a sign.



Thank you, Liggy for the kind words. I appreciate it.

Wolfbernz said...

Hi Cheryl,

What a great post! And darnit why are deer crossing signs in such high traffic areas?!?! LOL

Clicks!
Wolfbernz

Trina said...

I couldn't agree more, I hate seeing pictures of the latest hunted thing, too. I know it a point of pride and fun for them but I like being innocent of the whole process...

I did see a deer swim across the river and there were no signs allowing that crossing...

Great post!
--Trina

Cheryl P. said...

See, again you and I have something in common. I just don't want to hear or see it. Being clueless can be such a positive thing.


I love to see deer in the wild. They really are quite beautiful.

lisleman said...

thanks for the clip - I had not heard that one. Wow I can't believe the radio were that nice to the lady. I would not have been able to hold back. Yes what use is our government if they can't direct the deer to lower traffic areas. Maybe deer should only be allow to cross at specific times of the day. Hard to believe anyone could be that clueless about animals and still able to use a phone.
Oh I have not hunted since I was a teen but I don't have problem when people eat what they hunt. I don't think a tree stand would be fun for more than maybe 10 minutes.

oldereyes said...

Well, you and I are on the same page when it comes to hunting, even though I do eat meat. I'm not morally opposed to it or anything but I certainly don't want to hear about it. I don't quite get wandering around in the woods until you find a beautiful creature, then blowing it's brains out. My son in law is a hunter, by the way, so like you, I tread lightly.


The clip ... really? It's very hard for me to believe the caller was that dense. The radio people were remarkably composed. I'd have asked her if she didn't think it would be dangerous to have the schoolkids and deer crossing together, or how she'd get the deer to listen to the crossing monitors.

Galiciademoda said...

Ohhhh me encanta! Mucho mucho <3
Un besitoo preciosa

Paula
http://galiciademoda.blogspot.com.es/

Cheryl P. said...

I thought the same..that the radio guy seemed pretty laid back considering. I think given how dense the caller was...it was a disaster waiting to happen in terms of someone going off on her. I find it interesting she has had 3 previous deer accidents in a very short period of time. Is she plowing through a nature reserve or something.
Funny line about being able to use the phone.
You're right about the hunting for food vs. pure sport. I do feel differently about those things. I just don't like to think about it. My brother has offered us venison but NOOOO can't do that. Frankly, I am not much of a meat eater anyway but I definitely can't eat wild game.
I think tree stands are really less enjoyable when they collapse and break your feet.

Cheryl P. said...

Same here, I am not morally opposed to hunting but again "lalalalalalal with fingers in my ears" when the hunting stories start. They make me sad.

I thought the same thing. That's what we need .....our school kids and wild deer crossing the street together. It's all kumbaya until a kid get's lyme disease and then they have to segregate the crossings again. That's a very good point about the problem of the deer and the crossing monitors. Those crossing monitors are going to need special training on the most effective ways to herd deer.

Katherine Murray said...

I can SO RELATE!!!!! My son is a hunter. He hasn't killed anything yet... but he will, I'm sure. I keep wondering how he got it. We LOVE our deer behind the house. I take pictures... I get so excited seeing them. How did it go from that to my kid wanting to hunt! Of course, he got some deer from our neighbors last year and cooked and ate ALL of it... He loves deer. Hard to get upset about that... especially when I fish... which I actually STILL have problems with!

Luvbeingagrampa said...

Hey, don't stay on the computer too long...your brother is on the phone and he has a question..."he wants to know what blogs are".....

Cheryl P. said...

It is hard to fault people that hunt for food. I mean that has been going on since the beginning of time. Why I am such a whoosie pants, I don't know. I can't call myself a vegetarian as I do eat a limited amount of meat but I am darn close to it. I don't have any issues with others eating meat or hunting for that matter, but I just don't want to know about the kill. It is interesting though, that I am more comfortable eating fish than anything that had 4 legs.

Cheryl P. said...

I guess I have some "splaining" to do, huh? I can assume you are joking or my cell phone would be ringing right now.

Jo-Anne said...

I am not a fan oh hunting although to be honest have never tired it but then I have never tried jumping out of a plane and have no interst in doing either...............so I do not think I would be interested in hearing about someone else hunting............

Cheryl P. said...

Same here. I know that I could never pull a trigger toward an beautiful creature like a deer so there isn't a chance I would ever try hunting. I won't be trying parachuting out of a plane either.

abeerfortheshower said...

If I broke both my feet like that, I wouldn't want to give up hunting either. I'd want to get out there and shoot the deer that laughed at me, those heartless sunnzabitches.

momto8blog said...

we see dear in our yard almost everyday..they are pretty and gentle and they eat all my plants! My son wants to hunt..I am ok with that..I'll even learn to cook venison. I have no desire to hunt.

Margaret said...

I agree with that stupid woman. Who enables deer to cross the busiest parts of the highway? But seriously, I'd like to think that the woman is a good actress and was playing a prank.

Cheryl P. said...

Eating your plants...probably not the best way to make friends with you, huh? I don't suppose they make live traps for deer like they do the bunnies that eat my plants.

Cheryl P. said...

I am thinking some people just deserve to be laughed at. I bet all the deer that see hunters doing stupid stuff think to themselves. "Way to go dumbass...you so had it comein"

Cheryl P. said...

I tend to agree. Could anyone be THAT stupid????

Nicky said...

My friend's husband loves hunting, so when her son was born, I bought them a Bambi dvd. I figure it's too late to change her husband's mind, but maybe I can save the next generation.

Nicky said...

You can ask that question after some of your Friday news recaps?! :-)

Cheryl P. said...

You are so right about that!! In fact, I was just working on my Friday stories and it is really hard to narrow down the "most stupid" from just the stupid.

Cheryl P. said...

I love that you did that. I wonder how many people haven't started hunting because they cried during Bambi as children.