Sunday, June 12, 2011

The Birds are giving us the birds

I know you are all thinking that I typed that wrong with birds being plural but....no...I stand by the plurality of it all.  This year is starting to feel like a modern day version of the horror movie "The Birds".

First of the odd "birdyness" of 2011 is when  flocks of dead birds starting falling out of the sky in Arkansas, Louisiana, Kentucky, Tennessee, Sweden, Italy and New Zealand to name a few of the places that thousands of dead birds came  raining down. Call me crazy, when it is raining birds, things are getting freaky.

Then, it came to my attention via a conversation with Texas Pal that a neighborhood very near where I used to live in Dallas, is being bombarded with egrets. To be totally accurate, I guess the bombardment part is bird sh**.  Now I am not talking a couple wayward birds here. There are over 500 egrets nesting in one neighborhood.  These people in Carrollton, TX are having to use umbrellas when they walk out their front doors.  So in Carrollton, Texas, indeed, birds are not falling from the sky but bird poo definitely is.

So, you may be asking yourself, what the heck?...why is this conflicted
blogger sticking in her two cents. (Have you not figured out anything about me yet???...Of course I have something to say)  I will tell you why.

I AM FEELING THEIR PAIN!!!!

I have been having an ongoing "altercation" with my feathered friends for several years now.  It all started in the late 1990's when I was trying to enjoy my back yard.


Cute huh?  Little family of geese taking a swim behind our house.  See my bench. I would have been sitting their going "oooh and ahhh", except that  I was taking this picture. 


OK...I am still thinking they are pretty cute.  Did you know that Canadian geese mate for life? This is a real family.  Darling, just darling.


HMMMM...I am starting to get nervous.  See my deck chair minus it's pad.  There is a reason the pads were taking a little vacation into the garage. 


Now, I am taking the pictures from inside the house with a zoom lense.  Between the noise and bird doo, it is the safest place to be.



Holy buckets of bird crap...Don't go outside without a rain slicker on...oh and boots too.

The only thing better than geese in Nebraska is when they are hunkering down watching and I am sure ADMIRING the first snow of the season. 

Of course, all of that is history as we moved out of Nebraska and on down the road to Texas.  Actually, in Texas I managed a full six years without fighting with any feathered friends.  Guess it was too hot for them down there.  Just as well.  For those of you that read of my flood and lawsuit with Mr. Perot, let's just say, I had my hands full. If you need to (or care to) that was in the Lawsuit Lottery: You Too Could Be a Winner post.






So, now in Kansas, I have a new problem with birds.  I don't know if you can get an idea of the configuration but this is a second floor window at the top of my stairway.  Basically it is the upper floor of an entry way. To be clear this window is about 20 foot up from the floor.  Outside of that window is a tree.
And in that tree there is a nest.  Sing it now...and in that nest there is a bird... and in that bird there is a pea sized brain that is INSANE.

Every year for 4 years that freakin' bird starts in early spring and slams into that window all day...every day...from early morning to late evening for weeks...no months.   Why it isn't dead, I do not know. But all day.....

THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP

I know all kinds of theories for preventing this.  Decals, pictures placed in the window, yeh, I get it.  Keep in mind this window is 20 ft. off the ground.   However, there are wooden blinds with a remote control on order to, hopefully, keep this stupid bird from thinking this is a doorway. 

I will be updating you at some point whether the blinds worked.  Unless, that is, I am in an institution recovering from my breakdown. Thump..thump..thump..thump


The Good for the Day...Minimal bird poo by Mr. Robin

The Bad for the Day...He is not a quitter.  Normally NOT being a quitter is a good thing. Exception to every rule.

The Weird for the Day....That I actually have to buy wooden blinds with a remote control, so I can operate these things 20 foot up in the air...why???? to keep a bird from smashing into my window.









Maybe, if three little birds knocked on my door telling me "Every little thing is gonna' be alright" I would be more tolerant.


21 comments:

junebug1990 said...

Dang! That is a ton of birds. I've never been a big fan of birds and I blame it on The Birds. Oh, and the time I got pooped on right on top my head while talking to a boy I like in middle school. The horror!

We do have two cute ducks in our neighborhood fishing pond. So adorable these two are and they don't mind when the little girl in the neighborhood pelts them with bread. Two is the perfect number for me.

Bob S said...

Wow, you certainly have a way with birds! Your earlier pictures of all the birds on the pond are simply amazing. I, too, would stay in the house with all those birds out there.

As for your latest issue: lots of luck. That bird sees another bird (the reflection in the window) and is trying to get it to go away. We had a bird do that to one of our window for about 3 years before it disappeared. (I even put a shade over the window to think that would solve the problem, but it came behind the shade and pecked at the window.) Maybe if you think of them as love taps.....

Great story! Your posts are always uplifting even if the subject is driving you nuts at the time.

Iluvbeingagrandpa said...

Holy Bird Crap batman, thatsalot of birds....but the lake looks fantastic, Ill bet the only thing that got you to move was some adorable grandbabies....and if one of them asked for a pet bird, you would be only too happy to supply.....until the parents found out that Grandma or Grandpa had anything to do with it. Seems your photography is also pretty cool. Does this remind you of Alfred Hitchcock movie????

Cheryl P. said...

I had that poop on the head think also in middle school. I think that just sets us on the road for not being huge bird fans. But I, also agree that those little family of birds are pretty cute. I don't even mind if it is more than 2...just not 500.

Cheryl P. said...

Thanks. Bob S. for stopping by. The good thing about Ne geese is they are just migrating about 2-3 weeks and then they are gone for the season. Pretty interesting to watch. This stupid robin needs to head somewhere other than here. How long can one bird live? Funny...love taps//ha ha

Cheryl P. said...

No, birds are EVER to be gifted to the grandboys. I am not looking to be shunned by family members. You might remember the episode of Love Bird that had to back their birdseed up and find a new home. Parting was such SWEET sorrow.

SuburbanSoliloquist said...

Cheryl- swear to God, I was out running errands yesterday at Michael's Crafts, where, as I slipped beneath the portico to the store a little tweety bird made a nose-dive from the big A (in which there was a nest) in MICHAEL'S right toward me. I covered my head with my hands and cowered! He missed me, though. Psychos they are! Kamikaze birds!
Oh, but I do have a cute pic of chicklings nestling in the nest of a wreath hung on my friend's front door. ;)

Cheryl P. said...

I totally don't get what is going on with birds. Is there a strain of some type of dementia running through bird species? And yet, when I see baby birds, I all but go swishy. They are so cute. Esp. duck and geese babies.

Jayne said...

I love that you're getting wooden blinds with a remote control. That's genius. "The Birds" made a definite impression on me, too. We have a bunch of crows that will steal eggs out of the hen house if we don't watch over them closely.

Cheryl P. said...

Isn't that odd how that movie, even in relationship to the time it was made, was the scariest thing most of us have ever seen. When you consider that there weren't the multi-million dollar special effects, pretty impressive. Nasty (and noisy) crows..not my favorite, for sure.

quirkyloon said...

And hence the inspiration for the Angry Birds game! I suggest you play it. It might help relieve some of your bird stress.

hee hee

Cheryl P. said...

No wonder that app is the most popular app of all time. Maybe other people are having "bird" issues too. I wish I was tech savvy enough to invent a sequel involving breaking windows.

Don E. Chute said...

Cheryl P. - Regarding birds shitting in The Metro-Plex. We lived in Wichita Falls for a little over a decade [no WF jokes please] If a intruder [human] invaded your property unwanted, you could pull out your gun and shoot, if you felt really threatened...

...Why in Gods name can't you shoot a shittin bird in Carrollton??

Just sayin'...
...Aloha FSSF!

Cheryl P. said...

Egrets are on the endangered species list. They are protected by the Federal Government. If there are 500 in just Carrollton, it doesn't appear that they are all that rare. The video shows people from Dept. of Wildlife trying to help with the injured and distressed birds. That part is really sad.

Jewell said...

"Sing it now...and in that nest there is a bird... and in that bird there is a pea sized brain that is INSANE." Oh holy bird s***! That was the best line EVER! I'm still cackling like a damned fool over here! Awesomeness at it's shiniest!

I can relate though...out here in the middle of nowhere we tend to have birds bouncing off our windows too. I wrote a post about it a while back too. It really is mind numbingly irritating when they insist on trying to take a shortcut through my house.

I still say a blessing for the bodies that I have to haul off to the burn pile for their cremation. Luckily, for the amount of times they bounce off the windows, I'm glad I'm not having to pass on my version of last rites very often.

Cheryl P. said...

Thanks, my friend, for the cackling. Are birds becoming dumber or what? I don't remember this ever happening until the last few years. You are right about it being mind numbingly irritating. And frankly my mind does need numbing. It has enough problems.

jacqui said...

Wow! I have never seen so many geese in my life. Or so much goose poo. Or so much bird poo. This is all so crazy...but fascinating!

Cheryl P. said...

Oh, yeah, heavy on the crazy!!! I do agree with you though about some of it being interesting. It was pretty fascinating watching the flocks come in in one swoop in the morning and leave in the evening and to be replaced with another flock in one big swoop. If people moved with that precision there would never be a car accident.

Jewell said...

Well I don't know about them becoming dumber. I remember them bouncing off the windows when I was a kid growing up in IL. I even had a random one bouncing off windows when we lived in NV. Maybe it's just increasing more in the urban areas? *shrug*

Ally B said...

I am one of the residence in Carrollton, TX who is dealing with the birds. Your pictures look very familiar. That is how it happened to us. We have told basically by all the agencies "sorry, sucks for you, there is nothing we can do" so many times I want to scream. Pictures just don't do it justice - no one can truly comprehend the overwhelming smell, noise and dander unless you have seen it in person. You can't even go out of your home with out a mask or other protective gear on for your own saftey.

Most of the birds in our neighborhood are Cattle Egrets which don't even belong here. They are from Africa and either came over by a Cattle Rancher who thought it was a good idea or hitched a ride on a Transatlantic ship. I still don't understand why we are suppose to put our health, family and home at risk for some birds that don't belong. The native species might have room if the invasive species were gone...just a thought.

Cheryl P. said...

Ally, When I saw that story, my heart went out to you and your neighbors. All those geese in our lake make for a stinky mess but at least a lot of that was over with after about 2 weeks twice a year.

I can't even imagine the smell and mess you guys are putting up with. I would be curious how they would handle it in Kansas. Here bird droppings are considered a bio-hazard. I'm a realtor and once I sold a house with a huge nest in the attic. I had to get a hazmat team out to clear it out. I am also surprised that Carollton isn't concerned with aftermath lawsuits if someone gets ill.
I am with you, it doesn't seem right for humans to suffer in lieu of the birds.